Master-Admiral u’Saay, commander of the k'Nipp Armada, surveyed the debris field his flagship, the l'Tiir, was negotiating. Scorched wreckage, scarcely recognizable as the fleet of battle cruisers it once represented, was all that remained of the enemy. Another effortless victory, u'Saay mused. Each new battle seemed easier than the last. He sighed. How he longed for the challenge of a worthy opponent!
The shattered hulk of a vessel glided into view on the main bridge display. The remnants of its crew were still offering resistance. Its crude particle-beam arrays were firing haphazardly in all directions, but only a direct hit from close range by such a primitive weapon could damage a k'Nipp dreadnought. The enemy ship had evidently paused in its flight to pick up the survivors streaming towards it in escape pods from previously destroyed vessels. u'Saay bared his fangs. The decadent races always betrayed their sentimentality in the end.
"Sir," the Lieutenant, junior-grade who was the tactical-officer, said from his console. "Master-Captain c'Lau of the h'Baal sends his complements and wishes to offer you the honor of firing the final shot in this, your last engagement before retirement. That ship," he flicked the tip of his tail at the display, "is the sole remaining effective unit in the enemy fleet."
u'Saay shook his own furry tail. "There were no effective units in the enemy fleet," he said. "This has been a rout from the opening salvo." He stretched out his forelimbs and extended his claws to examine their sharpness. They were growing dull. As was the whole k'Nipp race! Frowning, u'Saay retracted the claws, tucked his forelimbs under his chest and curled his tail around his body. "We are fighting children, again." He snuggled deeper into his command couch. Distracted, he licked his chest. Wasn't there a warrior people left anywhere in the galaxy?
"Still, it is a great victory, sir. Surely you will become the Senior Master-Councilman after this, your seventeenth conquest." The tactical-officer sat erect upon his couch and preened as he spoke. "Speaking on behalf of myself and the crew, sir, it has been a great privilege to serve with you."
u'Saay looked up and spat. "Then you take the last shot!" the other officer complied and the hapless ship on the display disintegrated as a wave of phased-radiation slammed into it.
"The field is ours, sir," the tactical-officer said. "We have added another chapter of glory to the k'Nipp--"
u'Saay hissed and rose up on all four limbs. He arched his back and emitted a high-pitched, whining growl from deep within his throat. His hair was sticking straight out and his ears were laid back along his head. The bridge crew shivered and tried to make themselves smaller. They knew their leader's moods. He recently had both the Captain and Executive-Officer of the l'Tiir spaced for appearing on duty with matted fur. His fit ended abruptly as it began. u'Saay collapsed upon his command-couch and massaged his nose.
"We have merely dispatched another in a long line of botched races to the oblivion they deserve, Lieutenant," he said. "Do not assign any glory to this butcher's work. All it does is make us soft." u'Saay rubbed his face against the edge of his command-couch.
The young Master-Ensign who was the officer-of-the-deck was bold enough to answer him. "Perhaps, sir," he said. "But with all due respect, this enemy was a species previously unknown to us. That presented complications in analyzing their tactics. I am proud of the way we--"
u'Saay suddenly swiped the air with his paw. "Do not be proud of having overcome a race of idealistic monkeys, Ensign! We have been merely exterminators, today, not warriors. These... these..." u'Saay whipped his tail back and forth in a frenzy.
"Human Beings, sir," the Ensign replied. "I read the intelligence report. They appeared to be very resourceful."
"I read it, too," u'Saay said, bristling, "but only out of duty! I don't need an intelligence report to fight the likes of Human Beings with their social equality, their democratic government and their riotous culture. I need a regurgitation bag! I have seen all too many such races in my career. Not since I was a scabby-eared Ensign on my first tour, have the k'Nipp been involved in a campaign against an enemy awesome enough to challenge us and make us grow stronger--or die."
u'Saay rose on his hind limbs and grappled with an unseen opponent. "That is what the k'Nipp desperately need to face once again, before we all turn into fat, pampered, fluffy-haired--" He dropped to all four paws and trailed off into hacking noises, spitting up a wad of fur.
"But mark my words," he continued when he recovered his voice, "when I become Senior Master-Councilman, I'll send the Armada straight into the heart of the galaxy searching for another race of true warriors to try itself against. The victor of that struggle will emerge to rule the galaxy! And even if it is not us, we will have done our part in making such a super-race possible. Then you'll see some real action, Ensign!"
The Ensign ducked his head under a paw. "Yes, sir," he replied in a squeak. This had been his first battle.
u'Saay whirled around upon his command-couch. "Helm-officer!"
"Sir!" The officer and the slave-ratings in his charge all came to attention at the same instant.
"Order the Armada to form up in boost formation and lay a direct course to the homeworld of these monkeys. They are completely helpless now without a defensive fleet. After that mopping-up operation is complete, detach separate squadrons as necessary to cleanse whatever other systems these wretched Human Beings have infested. Eradicate them the same as we did their forward outposts."
"Aye, aye, sir." The helm-officer's ears could not have been held upright any stiffer.
u'Saay hunkered down upon his command-couch as if to pounce. "And see to it that we keep a tight formation in boost, this time. Your predecessor paid the price for letting two of our ships temporarily stray out of communication range during our last boost."
"Yes, sir!" The helm-officer swatted the face of one of his slave-ratings for no apparent reason.
"Sir, if I may?" It was the Ensign.
"Speak!"
"I have figured out a way to slightly extend our comm range and even gain a little visual while in boost through a re-calibration of the--"
u'Saay lowered his body deeper into a crouch. "Who authorized you to do this?" His voice was barely audible.
The Ensign swallowed and snapped to attention. "No one, sir. I have done some research on my own and--"
u'Saay sprang straight up into the air. "On your own!" He landed hard on the deck and began raking the steel plating with his claws. "How dare you? You were trained from birth to be a fully integrated member of the k'Nipp culture, not a detached, useless hermit."
The Ensign closed his eyes and trembled, certain of his destiny.
u'Saay was on the brink of giving the order to have the Ensign skinned, but relented. Another part of his duty was to train young officers. He had to combat the rot that was spreading through the k'Nipp people. "I will overlook your insubordination this time, Ensign," he said. "But you will receive no further indulgences."
The young officer almost collapsed.
u'Saay squatted on his haunches and scratched behind an ear. "We all must learn to follow orders as proud members of the k'Nipp Empire, rather than to idly daydream as the alienated rebels of an anarchist society. We do not want to live in a jungle without rules, like your precious Human Beings do, correct Ensign?"
"No, sir! I mean, yes, sir!" The Ensign's voice broke.
"Very, well." u'Saay leaped back onto his couch and lowered his head between his paws. "Carry on." He tried to relax, but his tension would not drain away. He knew that his problem was that he was as much a philosopher as a warrior. His enemy's metaphysical errors hurt him far more than their martial prowess. He swallowed and belched to ease the momentary discomfort caused by the ship entering boost, but the discomfort in his soul could not be eliminated so easily. Aggression was life! Meekness was death! Why was it hard for so many races to accept those facts?
u'Saay stared at the void on the bridge display caused by the boost field. They would be flying blind by dead-reckoning until they emerged in the system from which those monkeys had originated. Boost was a dark cave in which nothing could be seen, within or without. The Armada would drop out of nowhere upon the homeworld of those feeble Human Beings like a ground-transport rolling over a cub. u'Saay growled softly. And then he would retire without ever having matched wits with an equal. Curse his fate!
"Sir!" u'Saay recognized the voice of the Master-Major of the Marine detachment over the command PA.
"Go ahead."
"We have salvaged many of the enemy's undamaged rescue-pods and their contents," he said. "Do wish to inspect the prisoners now, sir? I can not guarantee that any will survive interrogation."
u'Saay snarled and extended his claws. He had no desire to see a putrid Human Being in the flesh. But, of course, it was his duty to do so. He retracted his claws. "Very well. I'm on my way." He leaped off of his command-couch and landed at the door to the lift. "You have the con, O.D.," he told the Ensign. "I'll be in the Marine's area and then in my quarters. Notify me immediately when we drop out of boost."
"Aye,aye, sir!" The Ensign stiffened his posture. "The Admiral is leaving the bridge." he announced formally. The entire bridge crew came to attention.
u'Saay entered the lift. "As you were," he said as he entered the lift. The last thing he saw as the door closed was one of the slave-ratings staring at him in terror. u'Saay spat. What did a slave know about suffering? The true suffering experienced by one who was in torment over the future of a whole people? How easy it was to be a slave in comparison!
Half-a-cycle later, u'Saay was reclining in his pleasure-couch while his personal slave was grooming him with an expert tongue. His inspection of the prisoners had been brief. The Human Beings had disgusted him. As he expected, they were a motley assortment of mongrel sub-species with no dominant member. They even stooped so low as to allow females to be warriors. u'Saay hissed, making his hair stand on end and upsetting his slave. How could the k'Nipp be hardened to take the next step in their evolution by toying with such maudlin races? He had ordered the Marine Major to execute all the prisoners at once without interrogation. What else was there to learn about Human Beings? Soon, the only members of that miserable race left alive would be the few specimens preserved for scientific research. u'Saay drifted off to sleep dreaming of being anointed with the musk secreted by the organs of a tortured Human Being.
A sudden lurch by the l'Tiir sent the dozing u'Saay and his slave sprawling to the deck. A grinding noise started somewhere aft and spread down the length of the ship. Alarm bells began to sound. His slave screeched as if her tail was caught in a hatch. When another jolt rocked the ship, the slave scrambled to her cubbyhole and u'Saay bounded to the instrument panel in the rear of his cabin. He punched up the bridge on the miniature viewscreen. "Report!" he yelled as the blurry image of the officer-of-the-deck came into view.
"Sir, apparently we are under attack by an unknown enemy!" The Ensign was hard put to maintain his position, his head was bobbing in and out of view as the l'Tiir suffered a succession of hits.
u'Saay spat and slapped the viewscreen with a paw. "Why wasn't I informed when we dropped out of boost?" A power surge cut off the other's image and reply. u'Saay whined and howled. He couldn't expect even basic competence from his own bridge crew, anymore! How long had his ships been in normal space while he napped, cruising around aimlessly just begging to be attacked by whatever puny rearguard those accursed Human Beings had assembled? And what had that bloodsucker-ridden runt of an officer-of-the-deck been doing all the while? u'Saay vowed he would never show leniency to an underling, again. He would see to it that tails were lopped over this!
The strained face of the Ensign appeared on the viewscreen once again as the system came back on-line. "What are your orders, sir?" he asked.
"Boost us out of here, you imbecile!" u'Saay shouted, outraged at the stupidity of the question.
The other officer flinched and cowered behind his console, his head barely visible on the viewscreen.
"Sir," he said in a quaking voice. "We are in boost."
"What! Are you mad?" u'Saay slammed his tail against the deck. Nobody could see to attack in boost. That was straight out of Tactics 101. Any academy graduate should have known that. What was happening to the youth of his beloved k'Nipp race? Another giant paw slapped the l'Tiir. u'Saay hung on to the instrument panel as dearly as his prehistoric ancestors had once clung to tree branches to escape canine predators.
The Ensign had disappeared from the screen again, knocked from his perch by the hit. "You are relieved!" u'Saay yelled. "Helm-officer, take command. Order the Armada to enter boost immediately! I'll be on the bridge, shortly."
"But, sir! We are in--" u'Saay cut off the reply and punched up the Major of Marines. He ordered the ritual torture of the moronic young Ensign and signed off before the startled Marine could reply. The l'Tiir absorbed another impact. u'Saay wrapped himself around the instrument panel with all four limbs as the ship shook like a cub after a bath. He whined at the top of his lungs. Why hadn't that clumpy-haired helm-officer engaged the boost drive, yet? How far had the rot grown in the new generation of officers?
The spastic trembling of the l'Tiir dropped off to a shudder and u'Saay made ready to dash for the lift in the passageway outside of his cabin. A hail from the bridge distracted him. Irritated, he glanced down at the panel, not intending to answer it. It was then that he noticed the instrument readings for the first time. They registered that the ship was presently in boost, as was the entire Armada, and had been since his original order. The Armada was being attacked en-route to the exit point.
u'Saay whined and flailed his tail. How was such a feat possible? It simply wasn't, according to the best team of k'Nipp scientists. But another hard strike upon the l'Tiir convinced him that the whole idea of boost stealth was uncovered waste. Some unknown race with a technological edge was clearly using the Armada's current occupation with the lowly Human Beings to get a jump on the k'Nipp. u'Saay hissed and spat. Who did they think they were?
He struggled to keep his grip upon the instrument panel as the ship reeled under him and answered the hail from the bridge. "Drop out of boost," he shouted, not waiting for the caller to speak. "Then deploy the Armada in battle formation."
"Aye, aye--" u'Saay didn't hear the acknowledgement. He was racing for the bridge.
"Report!" he yelled as he leaped onto his command couch. The damn lift had been jammed and he had lost two claws in a frantic climb up the access tunnel. u'Saay slammed his tail repeatedly against the couch as he listened to the tactical-officer's briefing. The Armada had been helpless before the assault, packed as it was in the tight formation necessary for controlled, multi-ship boosting. The losses had been staggering in a contest where only one side could see the other. The Armada emerged barely capable of concluding its present mission against Humanity. But it would not survive another such attack as a viable force.
u'Saay snarled and arched his back. Spittle flew from his lips as he violently shook his head back and forth. This had been the costliest engagement in the history of the k'Nipp Armada! He pounced from his command-couch and summarily executed the helm-officer. His delay in dropping out of boost had been deadly. When finished with his task, u'Saay re-mounted his couch and began to lick his paws clean. He appointed the tactical-officer as the new officer-of-the-deck and ordered him to search out their devious enemy and prepare to attack. Those alley-dwellers would have to come out in the open if they wanted to fight, now. He watched a Marine orderly drag the bloody carcass of the helm-officer off of the bridge and growled in satisfaction as it disappeared down the access tunnel.
The alarm bells sounded again. u'Saay sprang to his paws. Now he would have his revenge! "O.D.," he shouted. "Have the Armada echelon right. As soon as you lock onto the target track, come about on an intercepting course and--"
"Sir!" The tactical-officer interrupted him, drawing a withering glare. "We are in a minefield!"
"What!" u'Saay clawed the side of his command-couch.
"It's a trap, sir!" The other officer's tail was twitching. "We are taking casualties. We must boost out of here, now!"
"I'll decide that." u'Saay leaped to the tactical console. He could hear the ship's batteries go into action as he did. He hurriedly studied the plot-map over the shoulder of the tactical-officer. When he saw how grave their situation was, u'Saay bit the officer on the ear, drawing a scream of pain. The Armada had emerged into normal space in an area saturated with thousands of mines. The mines were actually anti-ship missiles designed to home in on any nearby vessel. The defensive weaponry of his Armada would destroy many before they could get through, but with so many to contend with, the result was inevitable. His entire command would be destroyed in less than a quarter-cycle.
u'Saay choked. But if they boosted out of the minefield, their unseen enemy and his secret technology would ambush them again. His ships would fall like skin-biters from deloused fur! He let out a long, low, keening cry. The first attack had been timed to force the Armada to exit boost in this spot, even allowing for the confusion and indecision that delayed their entrance into normal space. What kind of enemy was so cunning? u'Saay swiped the air with his paw. He hoped all the k'Nipp scientists who denied the possibility of boost detection came down with urinary-tract infections! He stuck his tail straight up and sprayed out his anger. Those behind him were drenched. u'Saay made no apology, but spun around and reached his command-couch in a single bound.
"The Armada will initiate boost, immediately," he ordered. "Designate drop out at--" He chose an exit point at random, not too distant, but surely far enough away to clear the minefield. But how many ships would he lose in the interim? u'Saay felt the acute nausea associated with the boost drive sweep over him. He could not shrug it off as usual, but felt as if a sour meal was festering in his stomach. The brief interval in boost stretched his nerves like they were a length of gut fixed to a bow. The l'Tiir was struck several more times. u'Saay ripped his command-couch from one side to the other with each hit. Finally, the ordeal ended and the Armada emerged into normal space free of mines or any other sign of an enemy.
"Report!" he ordered.
The tactical-officer's ears drooped. "Sir, we have lost a total of two-hundred eighty-three ships and crews. Most of the two-hundred and seventeen that remain are seriously damaged."
u'Saay scrambled to his paws and arched his back. His fur and tail stood on end. He whined, hissed, spat and snarled as his claws rendered the command-couch unrecognizable. Stuffing oozed from every part. Officers and slaves behind him moved to one side, but u'Saay did not repeat his previous indiscretion. After whirling around in place several times, he unleashed a long, deafening caterwaul and then collapsed onto the ruined couch.
"Who did this to me?" he asked in a hoarse whisper.
"That is unknown at this time, sir," the tactical-officer answered. "We are working on identifying the enemy through a post-action analysis."
"Be quick about it," u'Saay said with effort. "Your life depends on--" Alarm bells interrupted him. He jumped to his feet. "Report!" he shouted.
"Sir!" The tactical-officer was hunched over his console. "An unidentified squadron has dropped out of boost and is deploying in a defensive formation."
"How many?" u'Saay felt the saliva well up in his mouth.
"I count no more that forty vessels, sir."
u'Saay reared up on his hind limbs. "O.D., order all units to advance on my lead in assault files," he yelled. "Commence the attack as soon as a firing solution is reached. We will knife through the target and then execute a double-envelopment to cut off their retreat. At its completion, each unit will proceed independently and inflict maximum--"
"Sir!" the tactical-officer broke in. "The enemy squadron is running from us and will not allow us to close the range. They refuse to fight."
u'Saay came down on all fours, again. "Lazy, snoozing house pets!" he screamed. "Who are they?" he asked the tactical-officer. "Report!"
"Sir--" The officer hesitated.
"I said report!"
"They appear to be Human Beings, sir."
"What!" u'Saay fell into the remains of his command-couch.
"They are facing us with what appear to be their 'mothball fleet,' sir," the tactical-officer continued. "We could easily defeat them, if only they would stand and fight."
u'Saay felt like finding something to climb and hide in. Human Beings! How could that be? Then it struck him. He had been suckered! Those hairless apes had offered up their main fleet as the bait for a trap. They had deliberately sacrificed it in order to lure him into a killing zone, knowing there was no way it could have defeated his Armada in a conventional battle. Once he had destroyed their main fleet, those monkeys knew he would boost straight for their homeworld to complete his conquest. They would have found it simple to construct an ambush along the predicted path of the Armada. Using the technological advantage of their boost vision device, their scrapped-together collection of corroding scows and obsolete weapons had put the mighty k'Nipp Armada to ruin.
u'Saay twisted around to nip at his flank and spit out a clump of hair. The path to the rodent's den had led him right into a canine's lair! Who would have imagined it? A victorious sneak-attack in the dark against the k'Nipp who were legendary all over the galaxy for their superb night vision. What kind of sick society could invent a method to fight a blinded opponent, much less be depraved enough to use it? He slashed out at the air with both paws. Those conniving beasts had him at their mercy! If he stayed here, he would starve. If he boosted out, he would be destroyed while flying blind. Even if he ordered the Armada to retreat on normal drive until the Human Beings gave up shadowing him, the Council would have him ceremoniously de-clawed upon reaching home. He could never allow that to happen!
u'Saay dropped his head onto a pile of stuffing protruding from his command-couch and covered his head with a forelimb. He knew what he had to do. It was time to retire. Permanently.
"Sir!" The tactical-officer intruded upon his misery. "The enemy is attempting to communicate with us."
u'Saay did not reply. "Sir," the other officer went on, "the translation may not be exact. It seems they want us to surrender. A Captain Madonna Ali of the Human ship, Sixty-five Mustang, also demands that our commanding officer--yourself, sir--and our other senior officers turn themselves over for something called a war-crimes trial."
u'Saay hissed. How childish! But appropriate. It appeared that the only crime in a war fought by Human rules was to lose. "The k'Nipp never surrender," he said. "Signal that to them. Then order all units to activate the self-destruct sequence."
The tactical-officer complied, his whiskers sagging.
As he felt the l'Tiir breaking up around him, u'Saay purred. He would die content, after all. He had finally gotten his wish. The k'Nipp had met their match.
The End
Bio:I am an avionics technician living in Miami, Florida. I have been a fan of sf ever since discovering Heinlein's Juvenile Novels in my junior-high library. I have always been an avid reader and journal-keeper and began writing fiction in my late thirties after I discovered that I had a novel inside of me. I'm forty-four now, and the novel is only half-completed because I set it aside to hone my skills on short stories. I have yet to be published after years of effort, but I still have many more stories to tell, and no editor is safe from my work. The only other vitals about my life are that I am a former Marine and a diehard bachelor. (And damn proud of both attributes!)
E-mail: mark_stanley_g@hotmail.com
URL: http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Shuttle/7881
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