Issue 162, Volume 16
May 2012

Mutant Groundhogs

by Mike Berger

A military plane lost power;
the crew bailed out. The huge
bomber crashed into an open
field; it was carrying an atomic
bomb. There was no thunderous
blast or mushroom cloud.
Radiation from the bomb leaked
everywhere. In the blink of an eye,
hideous groundhogs mutated to
the size of a pickup truck.

Angry at having their docile homes
disturbed, they went on the prowl.
The soldiers that came in hazmat
suits were defenseless against them.
They were chased down on and
thrashed into pulp. Attacking a
small town they invaded the
hardware store.

Returning to their burrows, they
put up a barbed wire fence. They
hung out no trespassing signs.
While the Pentagon was plotting
how to take revenge, people in the
area were smart enough not to
tangle with those ugly beasts.