Aphelion Issue 242, Volume 23
August 2019
 
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A Good Troop

by Teri Wachowiak

Based on the Darkover novels by Marion Zimmer Bradley


Oh the devil in Hell was laden with chains,
For many a year it was there he remained
But he had an idea of a new change of view
With a different style of a hellish venue.

I'm a trooper from Terra, I do what I'm told,
But some places are Hell, and I'd rather not go.
I plan to prosper, get rich, and grow old,
Not walk up to Ole Scratch and hand him my soul.

So to God in his heaven, he made a petition.
Do you have any spare parts from all your creation?
And God thought and said, "I have some left over,
A bloody red sun and a planet, Darkover."

I'm a trooper from Terra, I do what I'mtold,
But some places are Hell, and I'd rather not go.
I plan to prosper, get rich, and grow old,
Not walk up to Ole Scratch and hand him my soul.

Oh the devil, he smirked and he plotted and planned,
To make Darkover the home of the damned.
He made mountains tall, where it's sixty below,
Put most of the land under cold ice and snow.

I'm a trooper from Terra, I do what I'mtold,
But some places are Hell, and I'd rather not go.
I plan to prosper, get rich, and grow old,
Not walk up to Ole Scratch and hand him my soul.

All the creatures he made were all big and all mean,
With teeth and with claws the like you've never seen.
And I'm running a cultural survey and study,
On a hell of a planet where nobody loves me.

I'm a trooper from Terra, I do what I'mtold,
But some places are Hell, and I'd rather not go.
I plan to prosper, get rich, and grow old,
Not walk up to Ole Scratch and hand him my soul.

So I'm riding in wrecks for not near enough money.
Ole Satan is laughing, he thinks this is funny.
By damn I'll be laughing when I finally shout,
"To the devil with Darkover, I'm shipping out."

I'm a trooper from Terra, I do what I'mtold,
But some places are Hell, and I'd rather not go.
I plan to prosper, get rich, and grow old,
Not walk up to Ole Scratch and hand him my soul.


© 2001 Teri Wachowiak

Find more by Teri Wachowiak in the Author Index.

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