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September 2023
 
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Aphelion Editorial 032

January 2000

The Senior Editor's usual drivel about whatever...

by Dan L. Hollifield


Hello again and welcome to another thrilling episode. This is the last issue of Aphelion's third year- Next month we celebrate Aphelion's birthday once again. Since I am one of those annoying people who count 2001 to be the real beginning to the 21st. century, I could say that this issue is the first of the last year of the 20th century... But I won't. Aren't you glad?

I'm looking forward to the next century. If my health holds out I stand to live long enough to see nearly half of the coming 21st century. So many advances have happened within my lifetime so far- and the rate is accelerating with every passing day. I was born in the same hour as the USSR launched Sputnik II, I watched men walk in space, and then on the moon, and now begin to reach toward Mars. I've watched airplanes get bigger and faster, cars get faster and safer, the computer become a common household item, and the mini-satellite dish replace the giant TV antennas that once adorned every rural home. I was one of the last generation of Americans who had to get a license to operate a CB radio in my car. Now the number of autos with CBs or Cell Phones is nearly equal to the number that don't. I am one of those drivers that you see on the shoulder of the interstate reading a map to figure out how to get un-lost. Now there are mobile GPS units and computerized maps to help us poor sods. And let the record state that I do indeed stop and ask for directions... frequently... Sometimes that even helps.

Another thing- If you're reading this then the Y2K fears were overblown, but if you're not reading this then I hope that you have sufficient stockpiles of canned goods, bottled water, firewood, and ammunition to enable you to survive the fall of civilization. I have only about three months’ worth of rifle ammo myself, but I could stretch it further by doing some hunting with handguns. In case of extreme emergency, I do have a black powder rifle and pistol and know enough chemistry in order to make gunpowder when my supply runs out. Hopefully though, civilization has not fallen, Mad Max is not running for President, and hordes of looters have not emptied the local grocery stores. At least, no more than usual. With any real luck, the millennium madness will wear off soon and the whole world can get back to normal.

And if you are indeed reading this then you can assume that we have reached normality and anything that you still can't cope with is therefore your own problem. We'll send Marvin back to lead you to the bridge sometime soon.

One final note; It has come to my attention that some of you are actually reading my editorials rather than scrolling on down and getting straight to the stories. I'm warning you, if this keeps up I'll have no recourse but to get up on my soapbox and preach about things like why you should vote, or why you should fight to retain your right to own firearms, or why you should demand faster progress on low-pollution automobiles, or even why you should uphold the rights of those people who run the adult websites on the internet. I can't promise that you'll agree with me, but I can promise that you'll want to think about what I say.

Until then, I am proud to bring you another issue of Aphelion. I'll shut up now and let you get to reading.

Thanks for your time.

Dan

THE END


© 2000 Dan L. Hollifield

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