By Svetlana Gelman

"Are you ready? Are you sure this is what you want?"
"Yes my love. Anything for you..."
This was how it begun, and my life ended.

They were deformed, tongues lolling, eyes blazing with orange flame... there was intelligence to them, but there was no reason... shrieking with half mad laughter and tears.

They were human, but that was too long ago. Some of my sores were bleeding, they could smell the blood. They were hungry. So many of them. I was alone. A look of horror froze on my face, the last cry left my lips as they tore my flesh.

I was then brought up to the bloody sky. From there I serenely watched as they tore and bit into my body. I saw the flesh leave it, white bones glaring at me in the dim light, bones crumbling, turning into dust... Then the darkness, I could see nothing, I knew nothing... the pain came back... and I begun to die...

I woke up in the hospital with tubes running up and down my body. The nurse checking on me, smiled.

"Good morning sweetheart, I'm so glad you made it. Didn't look so good for a while there"

"What... where..." the room spun around me.

"You're in the hospital Hon, someone found you in the street. You've been out for a week. You were severely beaten and left to die. Savages.." She shook her head mournfully "Do you remember what happened?"

I thought about what happened. It was real, but how could it be... I was alive. Was it a nightmare.. what happened to me... I tried to sit up, she helped me. My whole body was covered by bandages

"Am I... what is wrong with me!!!" I was hysterical all of a sudden, what was hidden by those bandages? I couldn't feel my body.

"I... I can't feel... I want to see what I look like!!!"

"Of course dear" the nurse grinned at me and started tearing away the bandages.

I screamed. The pain was unbearable. The nurse was ripping away my skin. I heard the shrieking laughter and started drifting away again... not again...

I jump, and the wings grow from my back as I fall, and the wind catches me. I soar high and free. Higher then the ocean bellow and higher then the cliffs, higher then anyone ever went. I fly in solitude and feel the air ripple through my leathery wings. But this won't last forever. I know it, and when I learn it, my wings fail me, and I rush to the ground. The blood blinds me, and I am gone.

I bowed respectfully to the figure in front of me. It was a man with long silvery hair, and a pale, beautiful, slim face. The rest of him was hidden under a black robe. He was talking, seemed like he was talking to me, but I was just one among millions, billions of bowed figures. I couldn't see clearly, thick fog was everywhere, but the man in the robe was perfectly visible. I listened to what he said.

"...and you are born to crawl on your knees... To reproduce and destroy. To stand and die. To die for everything... leave nothing to live for. To kill and be killed, to learn about murder and mercy... And you choose to forget all you learn when you fall into the abyss of your next life. You are the damned race and you shall suffer for eternity..."

I understood and believed every word. I looked up again, his face was beautiful, suddenly I had to touch him. I got up and swam through the fog towards him, he continued to talk, and fixed his gaze on my eyes.

His beautiful pale face.. it was made of bone, I was touching a skull. Horror struck me and I felt the world fading. But I wouldn't let it, not this time. I searched for his hands, held on to him, consumed him, saw him as the disfigured thing that I became.

The fear is gone. After embracing what you fear, no restrains are left. No longer breathing, no longer feeling the beating of the human heart, or the human warmth, so much freer.

"Talla, everything is all right, this is the end my love." He kissed me lightly. "We are together forever..." Relief washed over me. I fulfilled the requirements of the elders. We are now inseprable. I wrapped my dark wings around him tightly, and cried my fears out burying my face in his black mane.

Together for eternity... for the feared ones, monsters, those that lurk in the darkness, live forever.

The End

Copyright 1997 by Svetlana Gelman

About the writer in their own words: "My real name is Svetlana Gelman, I'm 16 and I live in New York City. I go to school, get OK grades, and try to figure out the meaning of life in my spare time. I have a habbit of rebelling when there is nothing to rebel against, and thinking too much. Sometimes I write down what I think, sometimes it disturbs people."

Svetlana Gelman can be e-mailed at:

Aphelion Letter Column A place for your opinions.

Return to the Aphelion main page.