The Piece of Paper by David Smith


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Post August 16, 2018, 06:53:02 PM

The Piece of Paper by David Smith

I would call this one an unfinished masterpiece. Good as far as it goes, but seems incomplete.
Cary Semar
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Post August 22, 2018, 01:41:51 PM

Re: The Piece of Paper by David Smith

I agree. The story has a lot of potential, but the beginning seems scattershot: the problems with the art project; disliking the art teacher; being in a computer lab/library; walking around; the girlfriend, etc. We never land on anything long enough to absorb it. Then suddenly our main character is seeing words that aren't there. It comes out of nowhere and while it feels vaguely connected to the absent art teacher, there's nothing to solidify that connection. Two weeks later, his parents are being told they will never see their son again. Again, there's not enough character development or plot development to firmly grab the reader. The idea has potential. The writing has potential. It just seems to need some focus and development. It definitely has the potential to be a good horror/thriller story though.

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