Debtor by Noah Zachary

Tell us what you thought about the April 2011 issue!

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Post May 11, 2011, 11:00:27 AM

Debtor by Noah Zachary

Excellent work, this is by far my favorite story in this issue. Written well, sucked me right in.I liked the character, he came off very well. Nice twist at the ending, it wasn't like "oh my god", but I didn't see it coming.
“The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain't distributed right.”
-Mark Twain
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Post May 11, 2011, 01:47:01 PM

Re: Debtor by Noah Zachary

I enjoyed this one, too. It was direct, no unnecessary verbiage, and the narrative was informative without seeming like an infodump. It was like hearing a story told, as opposed to reading one that was written. Very easy style.

Some of the language was a bit odd. The 'afore' and 'afist' are ungainly on the page, and though they 'sound' okay, they take some getting used-to. But there is some great language, too.

Wasn't too long before I reached a town, dingy place with tin roofs and empty-eyed people. Hungry people.

That's good stuff.

I liked that Lin's dialogue was consistent, terse. Very foreign sounding. That's tough to do, but when it works, it works well.

My only quib is that American infantry soldiers were not issued side arms in WWI. Our hero may have carried a pilfered pistol, but the first officer who saw him with it would have taken it away.

Great story, and I’d like to read more set in this backdrop.

Bill Wolfe
"I am Susan Ivanova. . . .I am the Right Hand of Vengence. . .I am Death Incarnate, and the last living thing that you are ever going to see. God sent me."

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