The Feb. issue is online


Tell us what you thought about the December 2004 issue!

Moderator: Editors

User avatar

Senior Editor

Posts: 1048

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Northeast Georgia, USA

Post February 05, 2005, 01:55:07 PM

The Feb. issue is online

Hi everyone,<br>I've just uploaded the new issue of Aphelion. Unfortunately, Rob Wynne is out of the country right now, and I forgot to ask him to create a February folder here in the Lettercol before he left. (It must good to be the Web-Maven, Rob has *all* the passwords, LOL!) So we'll just have to comment in this thread and copy our posts into the new folder when Rob gets back. <br>Enjoy the reading until then!<br>Dan<br>
"Extremely difficult- Virtually impossible- However, it should only take me ten minutes or so..."
Brice Linch - Max Headroom
User avatar

Editor Emeritus

Posts: 2379

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada

Post February 05, 2005, 06:33:50 PM

Re: Short Story Editor

Congratulations, Robert, on becoming Short Story Editor!
You're in the Editorial Mafia--you've been "made."

Your dedication to Aphelion in the form of hundreds of messages and so very many stories has been recognized--the job's yours. Good for you.

(Although it reminded me of the post about the threshold levels of stars where Dan quipped that four stars was "Staff Member Wannabe". In your case, that seems to have worked out. :))


Also, a thank you to Cary. His devotion and care in cultivating a crop of great stories each month truly showed, and I appreciated it, both as a writer and a reader.

Nate
<br><br>I must second your thank you to Cary (and McCamy, too). I've only been really working at this for the past month or so (procrastination 'r' us), and it ain't easy. I'm trying to standardize spelling and punctuation a bit, and providing 'edited' versions of files for the authors to approve, revise, or reject (wait until it's YOUR turn. Bwahahahahaha!).<br><br>We shall see how long it is before the masses rise up and demand that I be replaced by some other Senior Critic ... say, YOU have four stars, Nate ...<br><br>Robert M.
You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.

Jack London (1876-1916)

Critic

Posts: 119

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Australia

Post February 08, 2005, 11:00:42 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

I don't see much surprise being expressed over Robert appearing as an Aphelion editor. Was this the worst kept secret in Aphelion history, or did we all assume he was politicking to get in that big gold door :)?<br><br>Seriously though, I hope it goes well.
[img width=40 height=40]http://www.ozscififorum.com/100_010.jpeg[/img] Greg Guerin
[hr]
[url=http://www.ozscififorum.com:2tvavb2m]Australian Science Fiction Forum[/url:2tvavb2m]

Senior Critic

Posts: 387

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Somewhere outside San Diego

Post February 09, 2005, 12:00:39 AM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

Thanks for the critique Nate. I'd say I agree with most of what you found troubling. Particularly the, ahem, infodump at the start of the story. I think I'm finally ready to parse it down if not purge it almost entirely. <br><br>I suppose I don't necessarily think it bad to begin with a less than likeable character. Jechiel has hoed a tough row for a young man, so someone like that is maybe difficult to get to sympathize with right away--perhaps problematic for a short piece, I don't know. He's also generally annoyed, dissatisfied, disillusioned and so, yeah, he's kinda grumpy and cynical. <br><br>I suppose I need to figure out a way to address the odd mix of technology and magic, but I haven't found the right story for that yet.<br> <br>Ultimately, I'm not very happy with my writing in this one--it's one of those cringers for me--so it will be interesting to see what others think over the course of the month.<br><br>Dan E.
User avatar

Junior Critic

Posts: 68

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Post February 09, 2005, 04:24:53 PM

Skywatchers by K. Bannerman

Loved it! It was so nice to just 'drop' reality away and enjoy Sadie's life...sounded so familiar....<br><br>and then that dream...remembering...thinking about what might have happened....and watching her retreat and isolate herself...<br><br>and then the good Dr...and his way of getting info from her (and into play) and then his unpocketing of the pistol...<br><br>ahhh...never saw it coming...nice ending K!<br><br>Liked it...it just 'read' you know...I didn't stop and nothing 'jarred' the tale at all to me....<br><br>Very well done....sigh....wish I could do as well....<br><br>:-)<br><br>Jim
Last edited by JVRudnick on February 09, 2005, 04:25:18 PM, edited 1 time in total.
-------------------------------------------------
[i:1lubxs05]always learning to write GREAT sf...[/i:1lubxs05]
User avatar

Senior Editor

Posts: 1048

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Northeast Georgia, USA

Post February 09, 2005, 06:23:07 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

I don't see much surprise being expressed over Robert appearing as an Aphelion editor. Was this the worst kept secret in Aphelion history, or did we all assume he was politicking to get in that big gold door :)?

Seriously though, I hope it goes well.
<br><br>Well, we never actually told anyone that Cary retired or Robert M. stepped in. Its like the staff all said: "It seemed like the logical thing to do at the time..."<br>The editing in December/January was hideously uneven because *I* did it- in Cary's absence. Only with the February issue do we get to see Robert M. working in his own style as short story editor.<br>It wasn't quite a secret, but it wasn't something we talked about outside of the chatroom and some e-mails. But the short-list of everyone polled had Rob M. on top. It was a done deal, except for that peskey matter of maybe he might not want to do it. Once the brainwashing began to take effect, I knew we had him hooked...<br>Er, once he embraced the challenge, we knew he'd do a great job. :D<br>I'd say that it was a case of a secret that couldn't have possibly been more obvious.<br>Dan<br>
"Extremely difficult- Virtually impossible- However, it should only take me ten minutes or so..."
Brice Linch - Max Headroom
User avatar

Editor Emeritus

Posts: 3217

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Kaukauna, Wisconsin (USA)

Post February 09, 2005, 09:43:00 PM

Short Story Editor

I don't see much surprise being expressed over Robert appearing as an Aphelion editor. Was this the worst kept secret in Aphelion history, or did we all assume he was politicking to get in that big gold door :)?
<br>It may have been a security breach, but Robert warned me. <br><br>I thought about trying to stop him, but he could have used his new Voldemort-like powers to strike me down, or worse, immortalize me as an inept magic salesman or baldy in his Al Majius series. [shudder]<br><br>There comes a time when you have to duck & cover and hope for the best. ;)<br><br>Nate
Last edited by kailhofer on February 09, 2005, 10:36:07 PM, edited 1 time in total.
Hardcover, paperback, pdf, eBook, iBook, Nook, and now Kindle & Kobo!
Image
A cooperative effort between 17 Aphelion authors. No part of any sales go to Aphelion.

Senior Critic

Posts: 417

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: St. Augustine, FL

Post February 09, 2005, 11:08:27 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

I don't see much surprise being expressed over Robert appearing as an Aphelion editor. Was this the worst kept secret in Aphelion history, or did we all assume he was politicking to get in that big gold door :)?

Seriously though, I hope it goes well.
<br><br>I learned of it when I sent a query on a story that I had submitted in December. The query was sent to Cary, and I received the answer from Robert M. Cary was an outstanding short story ed, and I've no doubt that Robert will be likewise.<br><br>Donald<br>
A really good story can compensate for less-than-brilliant writing, but brilliant writing will not save a bad story.
User avatar

Editor Emeritus

Posts: 2379

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada

Post February 10, 2005, 02:48:25 AM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

(Sigh). Bone Up Yar was in the Serials and Novellas section -- Jeff Williams's fiefdom, not mine. I have been converting underlined text to italics in SHORT stories as I HTML them.<br><br>Rich Text Format and Microsoft Word Format both support italics, so (assuming you are using a word processing program rather than a pure text editor), you CAN use italics if you want to (as far as I'm concerned, anyway). Note that this may NOT be true when submitting to other publications -- always RTFG (read the f---ing guidelines).<br><br>Robert M.
You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.

Jack London (1876-1916)

Senior Critic

Posts: 417

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: St. Augustine, FL

Post February 10, 2005, 02:19:56 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

(Sigh).  Bone Up Yar was in the Serials and Novellas section...

Robert M.
<br><br>Dang it! I shoulda noticed that. And after you explained it to SimonOwens on the February Comments Folder, too.<br>
A really good story can compensate for less-than-brilliant writing, but brilliant writing will not save a bad story.
User avatar

Senior Editor

Posts: 1048

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Northeast Georgia, USA

Post February 10, 2005, 03:06:29 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

What's really odd is that lots of people still think that every submission comes to me, first, then I pass it on to the editors. Nope, each section editor gets their submissions direct. Except for Mare Inebrium stories, I never see a submission until after it has been accepted & is ready to go online.<br>When someone accidentally sends a submission directly to me, I just forward it to the appropriate editor, unread. I don't want my reading preferences to influence the submissions process. Each editor has absolute control over their section and whatever submissions they receive. Of course, each editor is free to send me a copy of any submission that they feel may be adult-content and need a publisher's judgement call upon. After all, I'm the one who'd get sued if we went too far. I can only think of 4 stories in all of Aphelion's run so far that I've had to reject entirely on the grounds of *too much* adult content. But when a third of Aphelion's readers are school-age children, I find that I have responsibilities to go along with my Editorial powers. (A later post by Rob M. prompts me to include here that I was asked by the editor of that section to decide if that particular submission had too much sex, or whatever. My reply was usually on the form of "if the writer doesn't want to edit the racy stuff out, then we can't run it.")<br>And if anyone feels that that is censorship, I'd probably agree- if there weren't other websites that *specialize* in adult content stories, LOL! Just pick the right market, folks. LOL!<br>Dan<br>
Last edited by Vila on February 10, 2005, 06:09:59 PM, edited 1 time in total.
"Extremely difficult- Virtually impossible- However, it should only take me ten minutes or so..."
Brice Linch - Max Headroom
User avatar

Editor Emeritus

Posts: 2379

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada

Post February 10, 2005, 04:17:49 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

... I can only think of 4 stories in all of Aphelion's run so far that I've had to reject entirely on the grounds of *too much* adult content. But when a third of Aphelion's readers are school-age children, I find that I have responsibilities to go along with my Editorial powers...

Dan
<br>Adult content? Like intelligent, balanced political debate? Yeah, I can see where people would sue you for running too much of THAT kind of outrageous trash.<br><br>Robert M.
You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.

Jack London (1876-1916)
User avatar

Editor Emeritus

Posts: 2379

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada

Post February 10, 2005, 04:21:20 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

... After I made the post immediately preceding this one, I thought of a question: Dan, do you read the stuff that the editors pass on to you for posting (if you have time), so you can see for yourself whether there's anything too 'adult'? Or do you just trust the judgment of the Editorial oyabun (that would be the Yakuza equivalent of your lieutenants or underbosses)?<br><br>Robert M.
You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.

Jack London (1876-1916)
User avatar

Senior Editor

Posts: 1048

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Northeast Georgia, USA

Post February 10, 2005, 05:46:32 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

I trust everyone to alert me if they think there might be a problem with some story. I'm trusting the staff's own individual judgement calls on when to call me in to referee as a last resort. I'm not going to be reading over their shoulders attempting to 2nd guess them. I trust that everyone at Aphelion neither needs nor desires any meddling from me. I am there to decide *only* when the staff feels there is a question about a particular submission. Otherwise, I leave everyone alone to run their own section.<br>So Bob, you *are* master of all you survey, after all. I'm merely a Lifeguard, in case you get in over your head and decide to scream for help.<br>I think that cutting 4 stories for having too much overt sex out of the 9 or so stories that I've been asked to make judgement calls upon in the last 7 years isn't too disreputable a record.<br>Dan<br>
Last edited by Vila on February 10, 2005, 05:55:44 PM, edited 1 time in total.
"Extremely difficult- Virtually impossible- However, it should only take me ten minutes or so..."
Brice Linch - Max Headroom
User avatar

Editor Emeritus

Posts: 3217

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Kaukauna, Wisconsin (USA)

Post February 10, 2005, 08:41:46 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

But when a third of Aphelion's readers are school-age children, I find that I have responsibilities to go along with my Editorial powers.
<br>Hmm? I have never heard this statistic before. How school-age are you talking here? Upper high school? Middle school?<br><br>A third of them? Do you have any demographic numbers that you could let us know?? This is not the audience I thought I was writing for.<br><br>(This is setting off my own self-censorship alarms. I have a few racy bits in my Nightwatch that I wouldn't want my 11 year-old son to read yet. A 16 or 17 year-old, ok, sure. They should be mature enough… I think.)<br><br>Writing for young adult readers is fine, as long as you know you’re doing it. That's a good market, and they'll have enough money to buy books sooner or later. Besides, I suppose if I can't get the current generation of editors to buy, I might as well plant the seeds in the next...<br><br>Nate
Hardcover, paperback, pdf, eBook, iBook, Nook, and now Kindle & Kobo!
Image
A cooperative effort between 17 Aphelion authors. No part of any sales go to Aphelion.

Critic

Posts: 119

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Australia

Post February 10, 2005, 09:08:49 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

Of course, each editor is free to send me a copy of any submission that they feel may be adult-content and need a publisher's judgement call upon. After all, I'm the one who'd get sued if we went too far. I can only think of 4 stories in all of Aphelion's run so far that I've had to reject entirely on the grounds of *too much* adult content.
<br><br>It is a matter of dubious pride that I submitted one of those 4 stories!!!!! Although that story is yet to find a home, I had no complaints. I think it's up to the editors to decide what's appropriate.<br><br>Coincidentally, I felt physically sick this week when I browsed a philosophy text that started with an eye witness account of a medieval torture/execution. Sometimes it's easy to write stuff, but confronting to read it.
[img width=40 height=40]http://www.ozscififorum.com/100_010.jpeg[/img] Greg Guerin
[hr]
[url=http://www.ozscififorum.com:2tvavb2m]Australian Science Fiction Forum[/url:2tvavb2m]

Production Editor

Posts: 143

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Post February 11, 2005, 12:14:01 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

A third of them? Do you have any demographic numbers that you could let us know?? This is not the audience I thought I was writing for.

(This is setting off my own self-censorship alarms. I have a few racy bits in my Nightwatch that I wouldn't want my 11 year-old son to read yet. A 16 or 17 year-old, ok, sure. They should be mature enough… I think.)
Nate
<br><br><br>There is nothing you've written, as far I'm concerned, that should trip any alarms.  The examples Dan referred to were extreme; in fact, the one that I read is the only submission I've received that ever triggered that particular alarm bell.<br><br>Trust me, you're fine.  :)<br><br>--Jeff Williams<br><br>
Last edited by Jeff_Williams on February 11, 2005, 12:14:39 PM, edited 1 time in total.
User avatar

Poetry Editor

Posts: 450

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Emerald City, Oz

Post February 11, 2005, 08:29:27 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

 Or do you just trust the judgment of the Editorial oyabun (that would be the Yakuza equivalent of your lieutenants or underbosses)?

Robert M.
<br>I believe Vila-san trusts his oyabun, Moriyama-san :)<br>*ducks for cover*<br>Getting back to the actual discussion, there has not been a time when I felt I had to ask Dan's feelings on a piece. How racy can the poetry section get, you say? I have a had a couple of bits of blank verse which I had to politely send back to their authors, trust me. Some 'graveyard' poets get a little over-graphic in their descirptions as well.<br><br>Demographics: I try and look at things and say "would I want my fifteen year-old nephew to read this?" (Difficult, as the little blighter is now eighteen, but you know what I mean...)<br>
KNEEL before Zod!
User avatar

Senior Editor

Posts: 1048

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Northeast Georgia, USA

Post February 11, 2005, 09:36:31 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

I don't have that problem. Somewhere, somehow, one of my inumerable Godchildren is always just turning 14. LOL! I keep being asked to be a Godfather. Now my oldest God-daughter ( #1 out of 43, present age 28 ) has just recently given birth to her 4th child, and the cycle perpetuates itself yet again...<br>Plus, I get e-mails from some of the younger readers. Maybe one or three messages a year. Most of them telling me that they want to grow up to be writers some day. (Some of the more frightening ones want to grow up to be Nate! LOL!) But all of them mature beyond their age.<br>As for the adult content in Aphelion stories, I'm more concerned about preventing graphic descriptions of various sex acts than I am mild cussing. (grin) I mean really. And it isn't just because of kids, either. My 60-something Aunt reads Aphelion stories to my 97 year old Grandmother. (Mostly mine, I admit, but still Granny does like exciting stories. She's nearly blind, but still gets around better than some 50 year olds that I know.) <br>Aphelion's readership is large and varied. You can't please everyone, and you can't keep from offending *someone* somewhere, sometime or other. My advice is, don't sweat it. Write the way you normally do and aim for writing the best stories that you know how to create. If anything goes too graphic for Aphelion, it doesn't mean that the story isn't good. LOL!<br>And what's the penalty for writing a story that's too racy for Aphelion's readers? Um, you get a polite e-mail from Jeff, Bob, or Iain that says something like "your characters are having *entirely* too many orgasms on screen. Can you edit those out without ruining the story?"<br>LOL!!!<br>Dan<br><br>
Last edited by Vila on February 11, 2005, 09:37:36 PM, edited 1 time in total.
"Extremely difficult- Virtually impossible- However, it should only take me ten minutes or so..."
Brice Linch - Max Headroom
User avatar

Editor Emeritus

Posts: 2379

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada

Post February 11, 2005, 10:57:52 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

...I get e-mails from some of the younger readers. Maybe one or three messages a year. Most of them telling me that they want to grow up to be writers some day. (Some of the more frightening ones want to grow up to be Nate! LOL!)...

Dan

<br>'Grow up to be Nate'? Isn't that one of those oxymoron things? Like 'jumbo shrimp', 'military intelligence' (sorry, Kate), 'honest politician' ... 'Nate' 'grown up'?<br><br>Robert M.
You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.

Jack London (1876-1916)
User avatar

Editor Emeritus

Posts: 3217

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Kaukauna, Wisconsin (USA)

Post February 12, 2005, 12:45:52 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

Some of the more frightening ones want to grow up to be Nate!
<br>Yes... It's working...<br>Soon all the little ones will want to be just like me... Bwahahaha!<br><br>:o I have only one thing to say to such a notion: Be afraid. Be very afraid.<br><br>Nate
Hardcover, paperback, pdf, eBook, iBook, Nook, and now Kindle & Kobo!
Image
A cooperative effort between 17 Aphelion authors. No part of any sales go to Aphelion.
User avatar

Editor Emeritus

Posts: 3217

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Kaukauna, Wisconsin (USA)

Post February 12, 2005, 12:50:20 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

'Grow up to be Nate'?  Isn't that one of those oxymoron things?  Like 'jumbo shrimp', 'military intelligence' (sorry, Kate), 'honest politician' ... 'Nate' 'grown up'?

Robert M.
<br><br>Nicely done. 'Bout time you fired back.<br><br>(Boy, the things you gotta do to get a rise out of these guys after they become big-wigs... :))<br><br>Nate
Hardcover, paperback, pdf, eBook, iBook, Nook, and now Kindle & Kobo!
Image
A cooperative effort between 17 Aphelion authors. No part of any sales go to Aphelion.

Senior Critic

Posts: 387

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Somewhere outside San Diego

Post February 12, 2005, 04:27:19 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

Regarding the issue of readership and editorial decisions regarding what is appropriate for this market...<br><br>In terms of censorship, I think if someone wants gratuitous sex in his or her writing, well power to them. But as Dan says, find the right market. And we all know there's a market for that stuff. Let's hope that market is always there, cuz if it should be vanished by this ascending false moralism, other markets are sure to follow. <br><br>From purely a writing perspective, I find that gratuitous/graphic sex generally has no place in what I want to do and find it more challenging to present sexuality in a manner that communicates the message without shoving it the readers' faces (although some probably enjoy just that...). The very fact that sex is so ubiquitous suggests to me two things: (1) I can't (and don't) avoid sex/sexuality in my writing. (2) However, I have very little reason to pen a full-blown five-senses sex scene. <br><br>Having said that, I think one of the fundamental and often elusive aspirations of all writers ought to be to offend someone somewhere at all times. More specifically, we ought to be striving to disturb people, undermine their taken-for-granted assumptions and get them questioning the status quo.<br><br>On the other hand, a bitchin' gunfight suits me just fine. <br><br>Dan E.
User avatar

Editor Emeritus

Posts: 2379

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada

Post February 12, 2005, 09:05:15 PM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

... On the other hand, a bitchin' gunfight suits me just fine.

Dan E.
<br>Or, as it turns out, a bitchin' towel fight. This is a teaser for a story of Dan's that will appear next month. Please proceed with the whisper campaign to generate buzz starting (3 ... 2 ... 1 ...) NOW!<br><br>Robert M.
You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.

Jack London (1876-1916)

Commenter

Posts: 1

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Post February 14, 2005, 12:30:40 AM

Re: Skywatchers by K. Bannerman

Loved it! It was so nice to just 'drop' reality away and enjoy Sadie's life...sounded so familiar....
<br><br>Thanks muchly, Jim! So glad you enjoyed it! <br><br>Kim
User avatar

Editor Emeritus

Posts: 2379

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada

Post February 14, 2005, 11:21:56 PM

Re: The Snake, the Bald Man, and the Baby

...By the way, the title tells me there‘s a snake in the story, but somehow I missed the slithery varmint.. I’ll probably feel foolish as heck when I find out where it is in the story. :-)

Donald
<br>Y'know, having read the story more than once, you'd think I would be able to remember why there was a snake in the title. Thank the deity of your choice for the CTRL-F 'find' function. Newen wears a silver snake-shaped amulet around his neck --<br><br>Still, every morning he clasped the silver snake amulet that hung from his neck and swore allegiance to his homeland.<br><br>and later<br><br>He clutched the silver snake amulet in his free hand and prayed.<br><br>So the snake is a symbol of the New Zealander culture and religion (and thus, to be all 'literary', Newen's bigotry). Greg, am I right? Close? COMPLETELY OFF BASE?<br><br>Robert M.<br><br>
You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.

Jack London (1876-1916)

Critic

Posts: 119

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Australia

Post February 14, 2005, 11:25:10 PM

Re: The Snake, the Bald Man, and the Baby

By the way, the title tells me there‘s a snake in the story, but somehow I missed the slithery varmint.. I’ll probably feel foolish as heck when I find out where it is in the story.  :-)
Donald
<br><br>This might not actually cast a better light on my efforts, but this story started with the title, which is something I normally wouldn't do. The snake was no more than the one hanging around Newen's neck, a symbol of his nationalism I suppose.<br><br>I can see that the flashbacks and dramatic development could have been handled better, but I'm not sure how else it could have been structured. In dramatic terms, for me the problem with this was always that the piece starts with a series of short snapshot scenes, but ends in a long drawn out scene where not a lot really happens other than a big conversation. It's true I suppose that Newen never really takes control of the situation or makes an effective decision.<br><br>I imagine this story in a very comic book style, in fact at one point I was tinkering with the idea of writing a comic script based on an expanded version, starting at 'New Zealand', and continuing past the events of this version, with Newen returning and the following aftermath. Well, can't see that one ever happening!!<br><br>And hey, I finally made it to the 'top' of the shorts list!!!! :)
[img width=40 height=40]http://www.ozscififorum.com/100_010.jpeg[/img] Greg Guerin
[hr]
[url=http://www.ozscififorum.com:2tvavb2m]Australian Science Fiction Forum[/url:2tvavb2m]

Critic

Posts: 119

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Australia

Post February 14, 2005, 11:27:08 PM

Re: The Snake, the Bald Man, and the Baby

So the snake is a symbol of the New Zealander culture and religion (and thus, to be all 'literary', Newen's bigotry).  Greg, am I right?  Close?  COMPLETELY OFF BASE?

Robert M.

<br><br>Heh heh. If I'd been able to type a bit faster, I could have answered the question before you asked it!!!<br>
[img width=40 height=40]http://www.ozscififorum.com/100_010.jpeg[/img] Greg Guerin
[hr]
[url=http://www.ozscififorum.com:2tvavb2m]Australian Science Fiction Forum[/url:2tvavb2m]
User avatar

Senior Editor

Posts: 1048

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Location: Northeast Georgia, USA

Post February 17, 2005, 10:13:45 AM

Re: The Feb. issue is online

As has been pointed out elsewhere, I forgot to tell everyone that their posts are password protected, so everyone will have to copy their own posts from this thread into the February folders. Most of you have already done this, but I still should have thought to announce it ahead of time. LOL!<br>Dan<br>
"Extremely difficult- Virtually impossible- However, it should only take me ten minutes or so..."
Brice Linch - Max Headroom

Master Critic

Posts: 889

Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM

Post February 18, 2005, 02:01:59 PM

The Feb. issue is online

<br>just wanted to say its great having the first aphelion of 2005. was busy for the last two weeks, but now the reading shall commence.<br><br>Lee

Return to December 2004

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest

cron
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group.
Designed by STSoftware.