Turtled Dove by Steve Evans


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Post March 10, 2016, 11:31:32 PM

Turtled Dove by Steve Evans

This is just about the most crushing ending I've ever seen to a story, and comes without warning.

Dismal, but excellently done.
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Post March 24, 2016, 11:25:40 AM

Re: Turtled Dove by Steve Evans

A space story about miners working on asteroids and returning with theirs ores. The interplay between the characters was very good and I like how it was diverse.

The use of skin color and good looks coupled with suggested language differences set a good stage in which the characters could be imagined with ease. And sensory input was also present which is helpful.

I think it was a little too ‘tech talk’ but outside of that not a bad story.

When writing about spaceships and their propulsion system and system failures, the ball park area is large! Some like info dump, as I heard it called, others don’t like any but a little! I don’t know how much or how little a story really needs! My engineering buddy at work just loved to fill up his stories with future technology that he imagined! I at one time told him that his stories were “technical manual!” I often did the same thing with my stories, but over the years have tried to tone the tech talk down. I don’t know how much is too much and how little is too little. This story wasn’t overboard with the tech talk in my opinion but maybe just a little too much. I’m sure each has an opinion about this subject.

The ending was a nice twist, which suggested a good relationship the two had with each other.
Good friends often do similar things with each other.

If the two were more professional—not close friends--- they might have discussed and reasoned out the best action to undertake, and in the end agree with each other on that decision.

Good English usage all though the story, and that’s always a plus! I liked the correct use of a hyphen.

Good one!!
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Post March 29, 2016, 12:43:41 AM

Re: Turtled Dove by Steve Evans

http://www.aphelion-webzine.com/shorts/2016/03/TurtledDove.html

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