A Lucky Man by Botond Teklesz


Tell us what you think about the June 2014 issue!

Moderator: Editors

User avatar

Editor at Large

Posts: 751

Joined: March 01, 2014, 05:11:50 PM

Location: Just look under your bed

Post June 11, 2014, 09:09:03 AM

A Lucky Man by Botond Teklesz

It felt incomplete to me. There was too much of a jump from one time period to the future. The writing is good and your premise is good. Perhaps if you made it a longer piece you could fill in the time gap better.
Remember: when people tell you something’s wrong or doesn’t work for them, they are almost always right. When they tell you exactly what they think is wrong and how to fix it, they are almost always wrong. – Neil Gaiman
User avatar

Master Critic

Posts: 1180

Joined: October 06, 2008, 06:53:45 AM

Location: Chantilly VA

Post June 26, 2014, 04:29:34 PM

Re: A Lucky Man by Botond Teklesz

Gotta die sometime. I liked this one. There was a scifi comic book story "something" like this back in the 1970's.

This flash worked for me.

RT
User avatar

Long Fiction Editor

Posts: 2661

Joined: January 11, 2010, 12:03:56 AM

Location: by the time you read this, I'll be somewhere else

Post July 04, 2014, 05:40:37 PM

Re: A Lucky Man by Botond Teklesz

Wait--hurricane? Where'd that come from? Mike should have hired a better pilot.

The style was sort of plodding, but I chalk that up to the writer not being a native English speaker. Keep at it, though; you'll get better. Interesting story premise.
I was raised by humans. What's your excuse?

Return to June 2014

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest

Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group.
Designed by STSoftware.