Original Strand Illustration

A Study In Alizarin Crimson

Being a Reprint from the Reminiscences of John H. Watson, M.D.,
Late of the Army Medical Department

Edited By Dan L. Hollifield

A Tale of the Mare Inebrium

"One likes to think that there is some fantastic limbo for the
children of imagination, some strange, impossible place..."
Arthur Conan Doyle



Some notes on the editing of Dr. Watson's manuscript...
By Dan L. Hollifield --Senior Editor, Aphelion Webzine--

This document was recovered in the year 2000 AD, from a tin dispatch case left for many decades in a safety deposit box at Claridge's in London, upon Earth. It was opened in accordance with written instructions left by one William Anstruther, identified as the sole living heir to the contents of the box. It is to be noted that Mr. Anstruther was the last known descendant of the famous Dr. John Watson, and that all manuscripts within the dispatch case were, at Dr. Watson's behest, to remain sealed until the year 2000, or until such time as fifty years shall have passed from the date of his, Dr. Watson's, death.
In the course of the recovery of this manuscript I have been forced by circumstance to reconstruct the meaning of many of the passages in approximation of the original wording. The good Doctor's manuscript suffered badly by its storage, some pages crumbling to fragments, some sticking together, yet still others easily accessible, so as to provide a true puzzle to assemble. No doubt this is partly due to the cheap nature of the paper in the handbook available to the good Doctor to record this singular occurance. This being the case, I beg your pardon for any gross inaccuracies for the period contained within the text. Such are the fault of myself and my fellow antiquarians as editors, rather than the fault of Doctor Watson. I cannot promise complete accuracy in the reconstruction, but I will state that it is the best version that can be made of the documentation at hand.
The inclusions of many "americanisms" in the text have raised doubts upon the authenticity of this document in the minds of several scholars. I can only state in reply that Dr. Watson was known to have lived for several years in the American city of San Francisco, and that it is not impossible for some of the local idiom to have ingrained itself into his vocabulary. As there are no reliable dates to indicate exactly what year this manuscript was written other than "after 1926", I can only assume that this was indeed the year of the document's origin.
As for the fantastical content of the text itself, I can only conclude that the good Doctor was indeed engaging in an effort of speculative fiction, as he himself hints at the end of this narrative. To assume otherwise, we would be forced to accept the existence of such nonsense as life on other worlds, travel through time, voyages to distant stars, and a host of other things unknown, and indeed unknowable, in this first year of the twenty first century AD.
Iain Muir, Jeff Williams, and Mark Cotterill have been invaluable in bringing this work to the light of day. Please join me in thanking them.

A Study In Alizarin Crimson





"Watson, I believe that several times now in our long association you have remarked upon my lack of knowledge of the science of astronomy."

I was visiting Holmes in our old Baker Street digs- on the occasion of my wife having left me to my own devices, whilst she traveled to visit relatives herself. After making my rounds as required by my small practice and spending the rest of the day at my club, I had stopped by my old apartments hoping that my friend Sherlock Holmes would be in. Mrs. Hudson was pleased to see me and I spent a few pleasant moments catching up with her before ascending the stairs to my old rooms. The comfortable sitting room looked unchanged from my last visit, save for the pile of newspapers in the corner which had become noticeably higher. The smell and apparatus of some chemical experiment still lingered over most of the deal-topped table, the patriotic V.R. in bullet pocks in the wainscoting of one wall was unchanged, Holmes' unanswered letters still transfixed to the mantle by a jackknife. I looked at Holmes as he sat in his familiar mouse-coloured dressing gown, stuffing shag into the bowl of his long-stemmed briar pipe. Confound it! The man still kept his tobacco in the toe of a Persian slipper! After all these years he was still the most untidy person ever to drive a fellow lodger to distraction. We had spent several hours in pleasant conversation, looking out the windows at the encroaching yellow fog, when Holmes began this particular digression.

"Yes Holmes, you indicated that astronomy was not usually a factor in crime and therefore you felt it best not to burden your memory with un-necessary data. You said that it made no difference to you if the sun moved about the earth or the earth about the sun."

"Indeed. Yes, that was the gist of my statement. You may be interested to note, therefore, that I have undertaken a study of the subject at the British Museum. As a side-effect of my investigations so far, I have reached several interesting conclusions- and am considering the writing of a trifling monograph on the anomalous surface temperature of the planet Venus. If, that is, I can find no information that invalidates my theory in future researches."

"My word! That's capital, Holmes. But it does lead me to wonder at the reason for your abrupt about-face on the subject. After all these years, I feel that I know you well. You would not have begun such a course of action if it were not related to a case that you have undertaken. Knowledge for knowledge's sake is just not your method. Yet you have immersed yourself so deeply into what you have- 'til now- considered to be a useless field of knowledge- so deeply that you have become an expert in some abstruse nuance of the art. Have you succumbed to boredom or are you working upon a case? If its ennui you've conquered, then may I say that I find this pursuit of knowledge to be infinitely preferable to your previous filthy habits to stave off boredom." It would not be the first time that my married life would keep me from being aware of the beginnings of one of Holmes' cases. Over the years that had passed since we had last shared rooms I had become used to his calls at odd hours and his entrance to my home or practice in disguise in order to enlist my help in one problem or another. But these occasions were few and far between in these later years. I was even more happy to be in harness once again, as it were.

"Dear Watson- Yes, I shall forever owe you a debt of gratitude for helping me defeat my addictions, despite my reticence in speaking of the matter. But yes, it is a case, one that I have not until today been at liberty to speak of- not even to you, old friend. It is quite a curious matter which has yet to call for direct action- forever your forte, Watson -for as yet there has been no crime with which the suspect can be charged... Save for a few minor offenses- nothing of consequence. But yet I cannot help but feel that there is something more sinister in the offing. I have a few threads, Watson, but I need more facts before I can draw my net closed upon my suspect."

"By Jove! Now, more than ever, I'm glad to have this time to assist you once again. Mary's health has not been the best, of late, and my practice has increased also, so the demands upon my time are quite full. But with my wife away visiting and my neighbor a doctor always willing to fill in for a few days, perhaps I can yet be of some use to you. I take it that now you are able to discuss the matter with me?

"Exactly, Watson. My client requested utter secrecy and until today I was obliged to honour his requests. Though I'd had my suspicions from the very beginning, I could uncover no wrongdoing on my client's part. Today, however... Today I fully began to distrust my client- as well as his motives. I felt in dire need of an ally- who better than my faithful Watson?"

"Thank you, Holmes. I am honoured. Tell me more about this untrustworthy client, please."

"Indeed, the case has its interesting points. My client, one Cyrus Jones, telegraphed to me on August the twenty second to state that he was convinced that someone was about to steal several valuable artworks from the Museum. He described witnessing an individual making precise measurements of several of the exhibits- as if to be able to duplicate them. This person then escaped the view of the esteemed Cyrus Jones by going into a small reading room and vanishing into thin air. Mr. Jones entered the room- after half an hour of watching the only door -only to find the room to be empty. The suspect was seen to enter an enclosed room with one door, no windows, only a small table, a lamp, and a single chair for furnishings. -And left the room unseen. Unless the Museum has hitherto undetected secret passages then the escape is quite impossible."

"Either he never entered the room at all or he got out by an unknown means, is that what you're saying Holmes?"

"Exactly Watson, you've put your finger on the nub of it quickly enough. The problem admits of no other solutions. I, however, looked into the matter myself and observed the same phenomenon. After meeting with Mr. Jones at the museum on the twenty third, I was able to put the suspect under discrete surveillance which lasted for several weeks. Frequently, I have observed this person to enter secluded parts of the museum and vanish silently away. Only today, I myself observed the suspect go into that self-same reading room and vanish as if into the woodwork. I am prepared to state that there is no secret passageway out of that room. I am equally prepared to state that the suspect entered said room under my observation and left it by a means that I can not yet understand. After watching the only doorway into the room from the time the suspect entered it until the time I myself entered, I find the room to be empty. Incredible! I love the challenge."

"My client began to arouse my suspicions when he began asking technical questions about the artworks. Questions that only a novice forger would need to ask, mind you. He was particularly pressing on the matter of one particular colour in one portrait of a landscape. An odd purplish-red that only seems to occur in clouds at sunset. He cast about for some time as to the name of the pigment and where it could be obtained. I, of course, recognized it at once as an oil colour called Alizarin Crimson from some previous studies of paints and pigments, but I said nothing of this to my client. Then too, not only have I not been able to trace his movements before his appearance in Croydon eight months ago, but I have also observed him looking slyly at the security arrangements of the Museum. His perfidy is quite transparent, Watson. Cyrus Jones is not what he seems. If he is not a forger or art thief I shall be obliged to give up my consulting and at last retire to Sussex and my bee-keeping. So, you can see that I found my client to be less than satisfactory. Indeed, the suspect behaved much more innocently! But! Then Watson, then we come to today. Today, I also observed my client perform the exact reverse of my suspect's behavior- or rather, to appear out of an area of the Museum that I had already ascertained was empty. There was no way for Cyrus Jones to enter it without my observing him, yet he did. Ergo, both the suspect and my client are not what they appear."

"But what are they? Holmes, you speak as if they aren't human." I must admit that here in the old familiar Baker Street rooms that Holmes' revelations seemed tales of utter lunacy. If it were any other man who said such things I would be forced to conclude that he was raving.

"That, Watson, is what I wish to find out. I have been observing the suspect for some fifteen weeks- doing extensive reading as part of my disguise. And so it is that from within the pursuit of my quarry that I gradually drifted into the study of astronomy. I found much that has helped me in this investigation in my reading on the subject. That reading brought me to consider several puzzles that I used to while away the time on watch. One result of this study is that I have deduced that the planet Venus is not as the popular view would have it; a world of swamps and huge oceans, but a world of scorched deserts, hot as an oven. The matter has to do with that planet's closeness to the sun and the extent of the cloud cover. My theory is that the clouds are too thick to allow the sun's heat to dissipate, therefore Venus should be arid and lifeless. I have checked my conclusions with my brother Mycroft and he is in full agreement with me. Another result is that whilst reading I have observed the suspect performing what I believe to be delicate measurements of several rare books and artworks. He appears to be preparing to forge copies to leave behind when he attempts to steal the originals. In contrast, it is my client who is seeking information useful to a forger. Are they competitors, or are they partners? Each seems to work alone, but are they working toward the same end? In any case, I bided my time, maintained my disguise as a researcher and read as I watched both client and suspect. As a further sidelight of my studies of things cosmological and astronomical, I have found reason to believe that the escapades of my client and the prospective thief can be explained by one bold theory."

"Which is?"

"That they both are not of this world. Aliens, strange visitors from another planet with powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal men. Or at least, possessors of a superior science."

"Ineffable twaddle, Holmes. Life on other worlds? That sounds like the purview of myself and my fellow writers!"

"Not at all, Watson. The available evidence is against you, it seems. I was able to come to the question objectively, since I was ignorant of astronomy and cosmology until I began my reading as part of my disguise. I was surprised to learn that with the enormous size of the observable universe then life is not only possible upon other worlds, under other suns, it is highly probable! Mycroft thinks that it could be possible to express this as a mathematical equation, but he has neither the time nor the interest to work out the formulae himself. Do not be deceived, the probability of other men living on other worlds is quite real and of a factor approaching the definitive. Given the amount of time that has passed since the dawn of creation and the sheer size of all we survey, then other worlds demand to be populated. The logic is faultless, up to the point of our never having detected such life. Quite a fascinating problem, one worthy of more study. Between cases, it would be blessed relief from the boredom. I posit that we are as yet ignorant of some means of communication- perhaps akin to wireless -that would allow said detection. But if Mohamed cannot come to the mountain, perhaps all is not yet lost. It could be possible for visitors to come to us. This then falls into several possibilities, to wit; If other worlds are inhabited, then these civilizations are either on a par with our own, more primitive than our own, or more advanced. Logic admits no other possibilities. Civilizations at or below our own level would not be capable of contacting or visiting our world. Only those more advanced than we would be able to do so. A more advanced civilization would have technologies indistinguishable from magic to our backward eyes. Impossible things would become commonplace with such visitors. And what do I observe from my client and my suspect? Both of them have done the impossible, before my very eyes! But, if both come from another world, with all the superior knowledge that would entail- then their odd comings and goings are the result of nothing more than... Perhaps an alien underground railway, so to speak. An elite transportation system. But why are they in London? What are their real motives?"

"Holmes, I am all at sea here. Creatures from another world? Men from other planets come to Earth to rob a museum? It seems an enormous waste of time and effort for such a small return. What could be the payment for a stolen artwork from an alien world? What could be the worth of our human art to an alien being? Would they not prize their own above any effort of ours? The matter is beyond belief! Next you'll be quoting from that despicable Wells chap, the writer."

"No Watson, Wells made his Martians look like cases of extreme evolution. Hands and a brain- all else stripped away by the forces of time. A good metaphor for myself, perhaps, but not applicable to our foes. Our foe men are men, just as you and I. No matter what their motives be, if they seek to steal from the museum, it is our duty to thwart them."

"So what is our next step, Holmes?"

"By one lucky incident, I was able to trace the suspect throughout the streets to an hotel and discover by what name he is registered there. The Irregulars followed him to his rooms and secured the number and name. I am assured that he is within his chambers now. I propose to pay him a visit and put him to the question, Watson. So far, he appears to be more deserving of our trust than Cyrus Jones."

"And what name does this suspect travel under? Smith, I suppose? That would make sense if the other alien goes by Jones."

"No Watson, my suspect rejoices under the sobriquet Guiles Thornby. He is of medium height, dark colouring, and possessing sharp, foxy features- not unlike our friend Lestrade looked in his younger days. Thornby appears to be in his late twenties to early thirties, but carries himself with the mannerisms of a much older man. Other than the obvious facts that he has seen military service, does secret work for a foreign power, either plays piano or uses a typewriter very frequently, carries at least three concealed weapons upon his person at all times, is conversant with a version of the Japanese wrestling method called baritzu with which I am also familiar- but more advanced -has access to a form of transportation that I do not yet understand, and wears a most peculiar chronometer upon the inside of his left wrist, I have little to go on in forming an opinion of the man."

"I'm sure that you have seen evidence to account for this wealth of information in the minutiae of his appearance Holmes, but I'm dashed if I can understand it without at least sighting him. What precisely told you all these things about the man? I'm looking forward to meeting this Guiles Thornby, but in the meantime I would like a fuller view."

"Then let us take up our overcoats and hats, and proceed downstairs to hire a hansom. Do you by chance have your service revolver about your person?"

"Why yes Holmes. As a matter of fact, I do have my revolver with me today. I suppose that I tucked it away in my bag in hopes of your having an interesting matter in hand."

"Capital, Watson! Capital! Come, the game is afoot! Let us go and see just what kind of man this Guiles Thornby from outer space turns out to be. From all I've seen, he's a better man than Cyrus Jones from Croydon."

**********

In our cab, I asked Holmes again about his deductions of Guiles Thornby's character. I knew that Holmes would have observations that would back up each statement. His power of observation never failed to thrill me with it's scope. I flatter myself to say that by adopting as much of Holmes' methods as I am able, to the best of my poor ability, I have become a better doctor. In that sense, much of the increase of my practice is due, in some small part, to my association with Holmes. The rapidity and direction of his thoughts, though at times unguessable to me, served as a guide for me to attempt to observe as well as see the things that fell into my own sphere. My friendship with Holmes was rewarding on many levels.

"I say, old fellow," I began. "What evidence did you see to bring you to those deductions about this Thornby fellow? I take it that you think the man not to be a proper villain and scoundrel? How can you tell that he has seen military service, for instance?"

"When I see a man who walks like a retired soldier, I feel it safe to assume that he has been a soldier at one time. An officer, from his manner, used to command and respect."

"And plays piano or uses a typewriter, you said?"

"Watson, how many times have I remarked to you upon the hands and fingers of one individual or another? The spatulate fingers of Guiles Thornby indicate constant usage at some delicate and intricate task. The highest probabilities are music or typing. Other skills would leave differing indications upon his hands."

"But you also said that he is in the habit of going heavily armed at all times. You saw him with three different weapons?"

"When I observe a bulge in a man's armpit, under his frock coat, I assume that the man is carrying a pistol of some sort. Another odd bulge at his ankle, and it is no great stretch of the imagination to conclude that there is what is commonly known in the Americas as a 'hold-out' weapon concealed there. Whether it is a smaller pistol or a knife, I have been unable to determine. And finally, when one walks with a sword-cane, one is advised not to allow it to rattle perceptibly. Mr. Thornby's cane rattles, to my ears at least, as if the blade within was not seated properly. These three weapons are all that I have observed him carry. Was there more that you desired clarification upon?"

"Yes, the Japanese wrestling? You could tell that from watching his movements?"

"Exactly. The exercise imparts certain habits of posture, which I have observed in Mr. Thornby. There is no doubt that he has been taught a similar system- his balance and movements have revealed as much."

"Well, you have already explained why you believe him to be able to use some advanced transportation system, but how can you tell just by watching him that he works for a foreign power? And of what importance is a chronometer upon his wrist?"

"Think, Watson! Think! The man acts like an agent rather than appearing to be acting upon his own. He spies out the pieces that he wishes to spirit away, measures them, but as yet he has done nothing else. I can only assume that he communicates these measurements to some higher authority and then awaits further instructions. If he is from another world as I suspect, then that higher authority will be a very foreign power indeed. From all that I have been able to observe of him, he is making no forgeries himself and has made no provisions to hide any stolen artwork. Therefore, he is not working alone- If, indeed, he is planning to steal the paintings at all. And the chronometer? Upon his wrist? Watson, the pocket watch is the very height of fashion for our modern gentlemen... But a watch upon one's wrist? And such a complex timepiece? It is far from being a common clock, my dear Watson. If my suspicions are correct, the timepiece is quite critical. Quite, critical indeed."

"In any case, we will arrive at his rooms shortly. Holmes? I just had a thought..."

"Be gentle with it, Watson. It is visiting unfamiliar geography," Holmes said with a smile.

"Very funny, I'm sure. Seriously, what shall we do if he has ridden this fantastic 'underground' of yours to some remote hideaway? It occurs to me that if he can exit the Museum in such a fashion, why can he not leave his hotel rooms in the same manner?" I looked out at the impenetrable fog of the evening and thought that even if he were an ordinary mortal, he would have little trouble eluding us on a night like tonight. Just as the clopping of the horses' hooves were muffled by the thick fog- and visibility reduced to a bare minimum- the suspect could easily make his getaway even using conventional means.

"In that case, why take a room at all? No Watson, he must have a use for the room or he would have never engaged it. He will not leave it by any means other than the conventional. Young Wiggins and the rest of the current corps of the Irregulars are still upon the scene, Watson. I am told that Guiles Thornby's room has a window that our young street Arabs can espy him through from a concealed location. As an aside Watson, my cadre of street Arabs is now into its second generation. Young Wiggins is the eldest son of the dirty-faced ragamuffin that led the Irregulars years ago, back in the early days of our own association. He tells me that his father still talks of working with the two of us with pride."

"Makes one feel his age eh, Holmes? It seems like only yesterday that I would see him purloining the odd apple or cabbage from a greengrocer's cart. Well, what does the grown Wiggins do for a living?"

"He is a greengrocer, Watson. The irony is not lost, least of all upon him."

"With this fog, will the boys still be able to peer into the window?"

"I'm told that one of the smaller lads is up in a tree, quite close to the window. The fog will have to get much thicker before his view is obstructed."

"The cab is slowing, Holmes. We must be at the hotel."

"Capital, Watson! Come, let us interview the elusive Mr. Guiles Thornby."

**********

As we descended from the hansom a small figure ran up to us from out of the fog. In the glow of the nearby street lamp I was able to recognize young Wiggins by his resemblance to his father at that age. For a brief moment, I pondered what would become of my own children, and their's in turn- for indeed, I was thrice a grandfather at this time. Both of my daughters had babes in arms, and my son... After recovering from wounds received in the World War he married an American nurse and they now have a three year old son -but then Wiggins reached us and began his report to Holmes.

"He's still there, sir. Writing like, he is. Hawkins just reported as your cab came rattlin' up."

"Hawkins is the lad up in the tree?"

"Yes sir."

"Good. Take these coins and spread them out amongst the troops- And, mind you, Hawkins gets a double share, as hazard pay for tree-climbing above and beyond the call. Cover all the exits in case Thornby should flee his rooms. I want at least two boys attached to his coat tails if he should so much as step out of the door without Watson and myself. If the three of us leave together, you may disperse for the evening. Are my instructions clear, Wiggins?"

"Clear sir. Hang about in case he bolts, then stick to him like a burr on a dog's tail and send word on where he rabbits to. If you all leave together, we're all done for the night and report in the morning at Baker Street."

"Capital, Wiggins. Carry out your duties. Come Watson!"

Wiggins dashed back into the fog and we entered the hotel. Holmes had already had Guiles Thornby's room number, so we proceeded up the stairs to knock upon his door. I cannot recall the name of the place, but it looked to be respectable, if a bit run-down. Although everything had a worn appearance, it was nonetheless clean. As Holmes knocked, I could hear movement inside, as if the tenant were pacing back and forth.

"Yes? What is it?" Thornby called through the door in answer to our knock.

"Mr. Thornby, it is important that we speak with you upon a matter of some urgency."

As the door opened, I saw that Holmes' description of the man as looking like our old friend Lestrade was correct, in the main. Thornby was of medium height and indeed possessed similar sharp features to Lestrade in his younger days.

"What's this all about?" he asked.

"It concerns your recent activity at the Museum, Mr. Guiles Thornby. My name is Sherlock Holmes and you- You are not from this world. I wish to ask you where are you from and why have you been taking measurements of various art treasures for the last four months?"

At the mention of my friends name, Mr. Thornby took on a stunned expression. His shoulders slumped and he stepped back to wave us into the room.

"If he's Holmes, then you must be Watson," he said. "Well, I can't say that its not a pleasure to meet the two of you, but it is an unexpected pleasure, at least. Sherlock Holmes- I should have known... From your words in the hallway I can assume that you've been watching me for quite some time. You probably think that I'm scouting the place for a robbery, but you couldn't be more wrong. There is going to be a robbery, but I'm not part of it. I was sent here to insure that the stolen works were not lost forever."

"You speak in riddles, sir," said Holmes. "Kindly tell your tale the right way forward, rather than starting in the middle as I have so often accused poor Watson here. Perhaps it would save time if I were to sum up what I have been able to discover about you and you may then tell me upon what points I err, if any. I have deduced that you sir, are not of this Earth, that you are the agent of a foreign power based upon a world circling some far distant sun, that you were sent here to take very precise measurements of a long list of priceless artwork and rare books on behalf of this power, that you have access to a truly remarkable means of transportation... What evidence can you offer that you are not engaged in some grand theft? I'm sorely afraid that you must convince me that you mean no harm, or we will surely be forced to throw in our lot against you. I put it to you again sir- What is your connection with Cyrus Jones and what are your intentions toward the exhibits that you have been studying for the last few months?"

Guiles Thornby looked like a man defeated. His posture betrayed hopeless resignation as he began to speak.

"My mother warned me there'd be days like this. This job has been jinxed from the start- Equipment failures, timing errors, people dogging my footsteps, things missing... I don't know how you managed it, Holmes, but almost everything that you've said is true. My only option now looks like making a clean breast of things. I assure you that I am not here to steal, but to prevent the loss of these artworks to history."

"You claim that you are here to prevent a robbery?" I asked. "Are you indeed then from another world?"

"No, Doctor. I can not interfere with the robbery- It has to take place. But yes, I am from another planet, I have been taking readings of all these paintings and books, and I do work for someone else. But I assure you that my employer has nothing but honourable intent. He wishes only to preserve these treasures, not to possess them. As for my connection with Cyrus Jones? I'm afraid that he is the thief that I have been slaving to forestall."

"Then we must stop Mr. Jones from achieving his goals," I said. "We can inform the Yard when he is about to strike and they can take him in arms and lock him away."

"I'm afraid that it won't be that simple, Watson," said Holmes. "You are no doubt forgetting that Jones also has access to alien transportation."

"Oh? Yes, indeed I did," I said.

"What?" Thornby gasped in surprise. "He's not a local? This is bad! Very bad... Everything has gone wrong on this job from the start- and now it just got worse."

"Holmes," I said. "What makes you think that Jones isn't simply in the employ of some hidden alien? Surely it is possible that he is just as earthly as we are, but works for some counterpart of Mr. Thornby, here."

"Yes, Mr. Holmes," said Thornby. "I have instruments that would tell me if another alien life form were nearby. None of them have ever reacted to Jones."

"That would still not explain how Jones has no history, no record of existence even, more than eight months old," replied Holmes. "I have been very thorough in my investigations and neither yourself nor Jones have any such history. It is as if you had both stepped out of thin air."

"The boss will have to be told that the thief is an off-worlder," Thornby mused. "This changes everything. I'll have to go and report in... Mr. Holmes, I'm sure that you don't trust me out of your sight, but I absolutely have to report this matter to my employer. If you'd care to accompany me, I'm sure that your evidence would be crucial to him."

"Holmes, do we dare trust this, this... being?" I blurted out.

"His story hangs together, Watson. Surely you can hear the ring of truth in his words? Mr. Thornby, we shall be most pleased to present your employer with the evidence that we have collected. I'm sure that it will be a most memorable excursion."

"But where on Earth are we going, Holmes? Mr. Thornby?"

"Not on Earth at all, my dear Watson," said Holmes. "If, that is, my suspicions are correct. I believe that we are about to visit another celestial sphere. Another world, circling some far distant sun."

"Quite correct," said Thornby as he adjusted a stem upon his wrist watch. "A world so far away that it takes sixty five years for a ray of sunlight to travel from there to here. By way of contrast, it takes eight minutes for a ray of light to move from your own sun to the Earth- a distance of ninety three millions of miles. I must say that you are both taking the situation very well."

"But the alien air! Will we be able to breathe it? Surely there are some hazards that we should know about first," I gasped. I have to report that I was still a bit in shock over learning that Holmes' deductions had borne fruit.

"Mr. Thornby is quite able to get by in our own Earthly atmosphere," said Holmes. "I think that we need suffer no fears of suffocation, Watson. Surely we all enjoy the same bodily requirements. I think that we shall be quite all right."

"If you gentlemen are ready?" Thornby asked. "Please stay close to me when the passage opens. Step through quickly and watch where you put your feet. You may feel as if the floor is moving under your feet, at first." As he spoke, Thornby finished the adjustments to the watch on his wrist and gestured towards the room's far wall. As I gaped with astonishment- which bordered upon stupification, a hallway appeared to fade into being in the wall- A doorway that had not been visible before. One that led into a long, dimly-lit corridor. Odd flickering seemed to mask the further end of the hall, like lightning at a distance. It was difficult to estimate the length of the hall, also, such that I began to wonder if it had been a good idea to go and visit Holmes that day after all. Bah! Truth to tell, my nerves were singing as they had not since the old days when the case was afoot. I felt more alive than I had in years. I could tell that Holmes was affected likewise.

"You see, Watson? I told you that the timepiece was critical. Jones carries nothing similar that I have observed, but he does have an unusual cigarette case that he takes pains to conceal."

"Where are we going?" I asked Guiles Thornby.

"We, will emerge into a private room in an hotel in a large, modern- for me -city on my world. We'll take public transport from there to reach a place where we can relax and wait for my boss to show up," Thornby replied. "Think of it as a gentleman's club for foreigners and you won't be far off. I can send him a message from there and arrange a meeting with him. After our trip in the meantime, I'd like to hear everything that Holmes has gathered about Cyrus Jones. I have to make my report as full as possible."

"Does this place have a name?" I asked.

"Yes," Thornby replied. "The planet is called Bethdish, the city is named City of Lights, and it is a huge metropolis and port of call for visitors from other worlds. Our destination? Its a bar called the Mare Inebrium. I hope you don't mind, but I feel the need of a very stiff drink."

"Excellent idea, Mr. Thornby. I'm sure that Watson and I could use a little something to take off the chill. Watson, would you care for a drink?"

"Tenderly, Holmes," I heard myself reply, as if from afar. "I would care for it tenderly."

**********

On the matter of our traversing that corridor, I have little to say. It felt like walking upon the deck of a ship at sea- the floor did indeed seem to move under our feet. The walk was about that of three city blocks and ended in a odd, but comfortable, hotel room with no windows. Our host again manipulated the strange watch he wore and I saw the hallway we had just exited waver like a mirage, then vanish entire. Fascinating, and a bit frightening. My old friend's eyes shone with that familiar fire as he examined the room's furnishings. He made a circuit of Thornby's quarters, much as he had in the hotel room in London. Thornby went straight to a device that greatly resembled a small typewriter. I watched amazed as the inside of the lid of the machine lit up to show images like small pictographs. Another of Holmes' deductions confirmed. I beat down a rush of shock as I stood and tried to come to grips with the idea of being on another world. Thornby typed furiously for several minutes, then hesitated, finally he pressed the carriage return key and turned to face us.

"Message sent," he said. "All we have to do now is wait for him to meet us at the Mare. I've called a taxi, if you gentlemen are ready to go downstairs?"

"Then we can discuss the matter of Cyrus Jones," said Holmes, "and why he must also be alien to our Earth." On that note, we exited the rooms and walked to the lift. The lift had, instead of an operator, an array of nearly one hundred softly-glowing buttons. Thornby pressed one near the bottom and the doors closed. I took a breath to inquire as to how long the descent would take, and the doors opened again to show an ordinary hotel lobby.

"Fascinating," said Holmes.

"We were only on the fifty seventh floor," replied Guiles Thornby. "Our cab should be outside."

**********

Our taxi was an automobile, of strange shape to be sure, but acceptable enough. I looked around at the tall buildings as would any yokel, but my excuse was that I had never seen traffic in the air or buildings that tall. In fact, I felt every bit the yokel. Our Cabby, an individual that Thornby familiarly addressed as "Bert" seemed to know that Holmes and I were visitors without being told. He kindly warned us that the ride would be different from any we'd had before and pointed out straps, as in an underground railway carriage, for safety grips. I was still amazed when the cab rose from the ground and merged with the middle layer of areal traffic. We flew at the height of tenth floor windows in the buildings that we passed. I could see more flying vehicles at what I took to be the fifth and fifteenth floor levels. Possibly there were more at even higher levels, since the buildings seemed to average one hundred or more floors, but if so I was unable to perceive them. Holmes said not a word as he watched both the scenery passing by and the cabby's operation of the vehicle. Thornby sat back in the wide seats watching Holmes and I with a slight smile upon his face. The ride took mere minutes, so high was our velocity. We rose, passed swiftly down the "street", turned several corners in a zig-zag fashion, then descended to the pavement once again. Guiles paid the Cabby as I turned to survey the crowds upon the sidewalk. I goggled at the differing shapes of what had to be people of far worlds right up to the moment that we entered one of the tall buildings. I remember striding across an ornate empty lobby towards a set of stained- glass doors. As I saw Holmes' ears prick up, I too heard the subdued rumble of the patrons- a familiar sound to any pub-goer.

"Gentlemen," said Guiles, then he sighed and spoke again. "Welcome to the Mare Inebrium. Come, we have much to discuss."

"Indeed we do," said Holmes.

**********

Once inside those innocent doors, it would have taken a Dante' or Bosch to depict the variety of creatures that I saw. I had thought that the taxi ride and the strange sights upon the sidewalk had prepared me for any mere pub. But I had been wrong. The room I now found myself in was both large and crowded. I could see recognizable tables and booths at which sat frightening marvels. Here, one patron looked like some form of jellyfish, while his neighbour appeared to be a huge orange tiger. There, a man-sized insect held converse with three small, short-furred bears. At another booth, a man made of gold drank with two normal-looking men- save that one was dressed as Robin Hood and the other was in jewel-like red and gold armor. I looked away to the walls in an effort to assimilate what I had seen. They were elegantly wainscoted from the floor to mid-wall, then paneling gave way to a wallpaper that shimmered like Mother-of-Pearl. Mirrors and paintings alternated on every wall and doors presumably opened into other chambers within the establishment.

"Steady, Watson," said Holmes as he gripped my elbow. Perhaps I swayed a bit, I don't know. "Despite their shape, these patrons are nevertheless people. There is no law of nature restricting our creator to the human form. Think of them as being from some unfamiliar country- China, Japan..."

"Thank you, Holmes. It is all a bit sudden..."

"My apologies, Doctor," said Guiles Thornby. "Perhaps we should take a seat in one of the inner rooms. It'll be less crowded and more quiet."

Indeed, the sound of several hundred drinkers was the most familiar property of this Mare Inebrium. About this time I remember noticing a subtle perfume. A faint odor of cinnamon overlaid with a trace of lemon. I remarked upon it to Holmes, his opinion was that it was either the effluvia of drink or the commingled odors of the varied patrons. Thornby led the way toward one of the doors to our right, stopping once to speak briefly with a strikingly beautiful woman carrying a tray of drinks. From that I felt it safe to presume that she was a waitress, but further thoughts were halted by her shockingly short skirts. Holmes has jested of me as being some sort of Casanova over the years, but nothing I had seen in the dance halls of San Francisco or Paris could prepare me for sighting such a shapely expanse of female limb. When in Rome, I thought- or some such. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Holmes glance at me and give one of his quirky, swift smiles- at my expense, no doubt. The woman glanced at Holmes and I and gave us a warm smile. We tipped our hats wordlessly and she curtsied, then walked away.

"That's Trixie," said Thornby. "She'll tell Max that you're here. He'll want to meet you- he's a big fan. Through here, Gentlemen. We'll pick out a table and wait for my boss."

The smaller room that we were ushered into could have passed for any club in London. Dark paneling, flocked wallpaper, massive bookshelves, still more paintings and mirrors. Along the wall to our left was a perfectly recognizable bar, while various booths and tables were scattered about in between free-standing bookshelves. In this way, each seating area was given privacy. Thornby spoke to the bartender, then showed us to a table. A man with bright blue skin and six fingers on each hand brought our drinks. He served us politely, then left- as perfect a butler as I have ever seen. The whiskey was excellent. The first sip burned going down, but other than that I never noticed it. I diagnosed myself as suffering from shock and prescribed more of this internal antiseptic. I was not surprised to note that our tray had held nine glasses. I glanced at our host and then to Holmes. His eyes were fixed upon our host and I knew that his concentration was fixed there as well. I sipped my second glass, this time noticing the quality, and waited for Holmes to speak.

In the quiet atmosphere of the comfortable room, Holmes spoke in normal tones, yet his voice didn't carry beyond our table. I theorized some type of excellent soundproofing in the walls, noting that the bustle of the outer room did not penetrate the wall.

"Your speech carries a definite American accent, Mr. Thornby," said Holmes. "Yet you claim to be a native of this world. Indeed, I find that here you are at least moderately well known. From my observations of the level of advancement of this civilization I conclude that we have not only traveled in space, but have traveled forward in time some three hundred years. I am sorry to subject you to yet another shock, Watson-"

"Yes, I had wondered about that myself, Holmes. In the lift, I could read the numbers on the buttons! And in the taxi, some of the street signs were in English! With everything else I had not made much of it until now."

"Capital, Watson! I have yet to reach your limits, old man. You continue to amaze me."

"Elementary, my dear Holmes," I said with a chuckle. "Also, consider that here we sit imbibing what has to be a genuine single-malt. London of the nineteen hundreds has no trade that I am aware of with outer space."

"Yes," said Thornby. "This planet is my adopted home, but I have visited America quite often. And yes, English is just one of the languages on this world, at this time. We are roughly four hundred and twenty years away from the London that you know. And your conclusions from that, Mr. Holmes? I must say that it is wonderful seeing you at work like this. I scarcely have to inform you of anything. You act as if you already know..."

I could see the effect that Thornby's flattery had upon Sherlock Holmes. As I have ofttimes observed in the past, Holmes seemed to be proud of this recognition of his talents. Therefore, it didn't surprise me to note that Holmes' voice was much warmer than before, when he next spoke.

"My conclusions are that your employer is far more powerful than you have implied. That you are an agent, questing throughout time and space, working for a collector of antiquities. That somehow, you seek to preserve artifacts that, for some reason, your employer deems to be important to history." At each of Holmes' pronouncements, the smile on Thornby's face got wider. He was clearly enjoying the rapidity of my friend's thoughts.

"Ten out of ten, Mr. Holmes. What we do is make recordings of things. Then we place facsimiles of these objects in my employer's own museum. No originals- excepting a few individuals like myself who volunteer, joining the ranks of my fellow employees -only copies are kept in the museum. But they are perfect copies, interchangeable with the originals in every way. Thus my employer has to take considerable precautions with his security."

"Perfect copies? How is it possible to make a recording of an object?" My questions seemed to be perfectly reasonable to me.

"Doctor..." began Thornby, then he sighed. "You are familiar with x-ray photography? The recording device I use looks deep inside an object and measures precisely every aspect of it's structure. The device uses a highly-focused beam of light to etch digitized patterns inside a half-inch cube of pure carbon crystal. This diamond then represents the photograph made by the x-ray camera. Another, more complicated device reads the information on the cubes, then builds a copy based on that information. It uses raw material- a shovel-full of gravel for a teacup, a bushel basket of sand for a Ming vase -broken down to it's smallest components. The machine then takes these individual atoms and places a carbon here, an oxygen there, an iron just so... All according to the record of the object preserved in the cube."

"Yes, it was in the process of these recordings that I have frequently observed you," said Holmes.

"In disguise, I take it?" Thornby asked. "You were the Reverend?"

"Yes," Holmes replied. "And the bearded student- And, I might add, the little old lady-"

"No! I actually handed you the umbrella that you dropped! I put it in your hand and never recognized you! This is marvelous! Classical, absolutely classical!" Thornby clapped his hands in glee.

"Mr. Thornby," Holmes said in a more somber tone. "Enough reminiscing. The time has come for us to discuss Cyrus Jones and the museum that, you have said, must be robbed."

**********

"Public records of the period," said Thornby. "Show that the British Museum was robbed of several prize exhibits on a date that would be, to you, eleven days from now. For me, it was robbed four hundred and eighteen years, plus some odd months ago. I have a list of all the items that the investigation of the time marked as never recovered- Those are my target items. Unless I finish my survey soon they'll be lost to history."

"And the records of the investigation reveal what? Please elaborate, Mr. Thornby." My friend had eased back in his chair and his eyes were closed in what I knew to be furious concentration. His long fingers were steepled before him, like some monk at prayer.

"They show that although a suspect was arrested- due to an un-named informant -and some of the property was recovered, the more choice items simply vanished. The assumption was that the trade in underground artwork- stolen artwork -had absorbed them for all time. No trial was ever held, and no record of the suspect or his release remains."

Holmes' eyes snapped open and he looked at me. "Its a pretty puzzle, eh Watson? We know when a crime is to be committed. We know what is to be stolen. We know the results of a particularly unimaginative investigation in advance. We know that no one but Mr. Thornby and Cyrus Jones have been at all suspicious in their behavour in the museum. It is no great stretch of the imagination to conclude that Cyrus Jones is the suspect of whom no public record remains. Can we not find a way for justice to be served in this matter? Mr. Thornby, it strikes me that after so much time has passed, the matter of examining the public records would have evolved quite some distance. Is it possible for us to examine these records that you speak of, with our advanced knowledge of Cyrus Jones?"

"My employer's access to the records is quite complete," said Thornby. "Its no harder than typing in the right code to examine them." Suiting action to words, Thornby pressed down hard upon one of the ornate inlays upon the tabletop before him. As if by magic, a rectangle opened from the tabletop and another of those small typewriters with a glowing window appeared. He typed for several minutes, muttered encouragement to the machine several times, then looked at Holmes with a expression of triumph. "We're in," he said. "I have access to my employer's database- the records in question. Now, I have to know exactly what to tell the machine to look for. What did you have in mind, Mr. Holmes?"

"Look for records of Cyrus Jones, of course. As far back as you can, and as far forward as- say nineteen hundred and fifty," Holmes replied. "We can safely assume that Jones is the villain upon the fact that no others have been observed. Let us see if Jones is of Earthly or un-Earthly origin."

"Search string... Public Records- Croydon comma eighteen fifty to nineteen fifty- subject- semicolon- Cyrus Jones..." Thornby muttered as he typed. "New search... Public Records- London comma eighteen fifty to nineteen fifty- subject- semicolon- Cyrus Jones... Cross reference police files- comma- same- same- same..." He looked up again and smiled. "It should take a few minutes for the results."

In the pause that followed I could have sworn that I had heard the sound of a hearty English voice that was addressed by the bartender as "Brigadier". Moments later I saw a scorpion- as large as an elephant! -walk by the nook where our table was located. Moments after this apparition had passed I distinctly heard our waiter's voice saying "This way, Sir."

"One of my best friends," said Thornby, waiving a hand to indicate the creature that had just passed. "An old soldier who now serves his people in the diplomatic corps. A good ally in a rough-and-tumble, too. I met him about eighty seven years ago. He's about three hundred years old now- local time. Late-middle-age for his people. Ah, the search results are in..." Thornby stared at the words on the glowing window and spoke absently. "There are no records, anywhere, of our Cyrus Jones- none."

"Like yourself," Holmes replied. "Jones leaves no trace upon the waters of history. My inquiries into the references he gave me have turned up no trace at all of the elusive Jones. My conclusion is that he is no more of our time and place than you, yourself. Further, since the informant that leads to the quoted arrest is not recorded, it is quite possible that it is none other than Watson and myself. And that Jones is to be held for a time, then escape in such a manner to some day embarrass the police if made a matter of record. Whereupon they do away with the existing records. Remember the Ripper, Watson. When the murders suddenly stopped, the police simply closed up shop. I theorize that Cyrus Jones makes his getaway from the lockup my means of the same sort of transport system that brought us here. The lack of record of his birth is not unusual, as records of the time are notorious for their lack. His lack of tax registry, post address, employment, passport, driving license, military service- all point to his having made a sudden arrival in England. He may have traveled from another world or from another time. We have no way of knowing at this point. I have here the list of items that you were to record, taken from your rooms in London, Mr. Thornby. I take it that this closely matches the list of unrecovered items from the museum? Good- I think what we need at this point is a method of detecting Jones in mid-burgle, so to speak."

"It is a shame," I said, "that we have only eleven days in which to act."

"We have all the time that we need, Watson," Thornby replied. "My employer can send us back to the moment after we left. Or even to the night of the crime, if that's what we decide on." On that note, I prescribed another drink. Although I was not used to imbibing in such quantities, the alcohol was helping me cope with the shock. Traveling in time could make one's head spin. I idly wondered at the machinery necessary to do such a thing, but only for a moment.

"How much longer do you expect that we will have to wait for your employer?" I asked of Thornby.

"He should arrive soon," he replied.

Within a very few minutes, the waiter brought a small silver tray bearing a single card. Upon it, Holmes read aloud; "Professor Eustas Grey, Xeno-Archeology department, Emperor Norton University- San Francisco, California, NAC."

"That's him," said Thornby with relief.

**********

The man that our waiter next led to our table was of medium height, having short gray hair and gray eyes, wearing a oddly cut dark gray suit. It was odd in that the coat had no collar of its own and allowed the collar of the Professor's shirt, or cravat, to show. He appeared to be of middle-age, and in good health. He was tanned and quite fit- I took him to be a very active man. He looked quite like the archaeologist his card proclaimed him to be, as well as the studious archiver of some fantastic museum of antiquities. In no way, however, could I reconcile his appearance with my knowledge that he was some mysteriously powerful force in the preservation of history. A traveler in time, an archiver of the lost treasures of the past. He sat, and the waiter brought another tray of drinks- of a more normal number this time, I was glad to see. The Professor toasted to our health and passed a few pleasantries off to us before he got down to the business at hand.

"Gentlemen," he said. "A crime against history, against posterity as we know it, is about to be committed. I have kept abreast of Thornby's researches since I received his message that you had arrived. Normally, I would be dead set against involving contemporary assistance, but in the case of Holmes and Watson- Why, I'd be a fool to turn away such help. Already you have uncovered evidence that the crime is not based in the normal scheme of things. Two things I see that we will need for our investigation, knowledge of from where Cyrus Jones is operating, and from when. Mr. Holmes, if you could inform me of your progress? I would find it most useful."

Holmes gladly re-capped his findings so far and outlined his needs to the Professor. When he concluded, the Professor assumed a grave aspect. "It will be a delicate undertaking," the Professor stated solemnly. "The lack of records acts in our favor, but to trap Jones and track down his own master is quite another question. The most delicate point is that there is no indication in any record that Jones is indeed the culprit. While the evidence is overwhelming in favor of that conclusion- I remind you that there is no historical proof. Nor is there proof in modern records that a thief is ever punished for this crime. Your study in Alizarin Crimson seem pre-destined to be barren of fruit."

"I cannot help but wish that we could bring this Jones before a judge," I said. "But what could we say to a prosecutor that would give him evidence for a conviction? Somehow, 'Sir, here is a man from outer space that we have caught in the act of burglary' ...is likely to result in our being detained ourselves."

"Yes, our own position is weak in respect to the authorities," replied the Professor. "But it should yet be possible to engineer Jones' arrest by the London police. But we know that he will not remain in custody. The escape that Holmes postulates could well turn out to be Jones' rescue by his own employer. A simple pick-up... I, myself, could retrieve Thornby from out of any prison- or from solid rock, for that matter -if he should so bungle a job and manage to wind up there. Holmes, do you feel safe in assuming that Jones is indeed the counterpart of my man Thornby rather than the prime mover in this crime?"

"The evidence certainly leads to that conclusion, but as yet I feel it to be unproven," Holmes replied. "Jones has hired rooms in London- I have followed him to them. His cover since he engaged my services has been maintained almost faultlessly. Our major clues seem to indicate that the crime will be burglary and that replacement forgeries will be substituted for at least some of the stolen goods. Gentlemen? Why?"

"Why leave only some few forgeries?" I asked. "To gain time to sell those items at leisure, I suppose. The others must already be promised to buyers."

"Watson, you are scintillating today!" Holmes exclaimed. "yet, there seems more to the matter than your theory covers."

"Yes," said Thornby. "If he can pop in and out like I do, then escape off-world to make his sales... Why bother with any forgeries at all? As a cover for the theft being by an off-worlder? The copies would have to be done by local forgers do accomplish that. And what if he can travel in time? Grey here could clean out that whole museum in the blink of an eye, were he a thief. I don't doubt that Jones' boss could do something similar if he wanted. My question is whether Jones is a time traveler or merely a space traveler."

"I recall it being a dictum of Holmes to avoid theorizing without evidence," sighed the Professor. "So far our evidence is Jones' appearances and vanishings and his questionable activities as Holmes' client. I can study the areas of the British Museum that Holmes has indicated as where that Jones performed his re-appearing act with my machinery. That could possibly tell us if Jones is a time traveler. But the measurements will have to be very precise." The Professor then withdrew a small, flat leather case from an inside pocket of his suit coat. He opened the case and unfolded it to reveal an even smaller typewriter than I had yet seen. A screen the size of a playing card was set into the lid of the case, whilst the keys were set into the lower half. Professor Grey typed for a few moments, asked of Holmes the precise time that Jones had appeared from the empty area of the museum, then typed for a few minutes more. None of us spoke, otherwise, until he was finished.

"There," he said. "I have the search underway. Three searches, in fact- the museum, Jones' rooms, and for comparison- Thornby's own rooms. It will take some time to run, would you gentlemen care for another drink? Holmes, if you have your pipe about you, please feel free to indulge." As Professor Grey spoke, Thornby signaled the waiter and I saw Holmes had retrieved his pipe and begin to tamp shag into the bowl. "Cigar, Watson? New Havana leaf, grown on a world named Hispan-yola... from seeds taken from your own world's Cuba," added the Professor. I accepted out of curiosity and found the cigar to be of the highest quality. As the Professor and I lit our cigars, two small depressions formed in the tabletop- one in front of each of us. I took these to be ash trays, which the Professor confirmed. The waiter silently brought fresh drinks.

"Jones' employer..." murmured Holmes, "I must admit, takes up entirely too much of my thoughts. I dislike the unknown quantity. What are his limits? What is it possible for him to do and what is, for him, impossible? What are his motivations? Profit? Ownership? What are Jones' instructions? This hidden figure, he has immediate use for some of the stolen exhibits, yet must cover part of the theft with forgeries. To buy time, as Watson suggests? Or rather as cover, as Thornby has pointed out? Gentlemen, without fresh evidence, I feel that we are wasting time."

"Mr. Holmes," said the Professor. "The search my machinery is making is more delicate and thorough than any you, yourself could possibly make. No grain of sand or fingerprint will remain unseen. We have formed our theories, we have gathered our evidence, now we merely await the results of tests from my laboratories to refute or confirm our deductions. Relax, Holmes. Time, for once, is on your side."

"Yes it is," said Thornby in a affected, sing-song voice, then he chuckled. Professor Grey looked at him as if Thornby had just perpetrated a pun. Thornby, for his part, looked momentarily abashed. Then he took on an intent look and spoke. "Grey, if Jones is an off-worlder, isn't there a chance that there is some sort of police on his own world we could turn him over to? Grand theft, smuggling, burglary... There ought to be someone in the time period with some kind of authority over that."

"Galactic Patrol? Space Rangers?" the Professor chuckled. "Our best bet would be whatever passes for the Customs Authority on his world. We will have to find out just which world it is, however, before we can notify its police. If my equipment can trace Jones' movements back far enough- Well, we will then have a chance."

"And if Jones is a traveler in time?" I asked. "What then?"

"Then, the task of punishing Jones becomes much harder. And stopping him may turn out to be out of the question..."

"Professor," said Holmes, still puffing upon his pipe. "Do any of the stolen items ever turn up again? No matter when or where, but do they ever re-appear?"

"Not on Earth," replied the Professor. "Not in all of Earth's history."

"Upon other worlds, then?"

"The search would take decades, Holmes. Even with my equipment. There are so many worlds to search- it would be like trying to find a particular grain of sand out of all the beaches upon Earth."

"Could we put a tracer on something we know he'll steal and track him back to his base? True, we'd have to let him commit the crime and escape," Thornby mused, "but then we'd have him!"

"Vanilla extract," I chuckled at the memory. "For Toby to sniff..."

Holmes smiled. "Or creosote, Watson? I'm afraid this job would be beyond poor Toby's ability. He could not follow a scent from world to world."

"No doubt the noble beast has long since passed on, in any case, Holmes," I said. "I do hope that he was allowed to sire a few litters, a trait like that nose should be kept vital in a bloodline." The memory of Toby brought me to the memory of one of my own dogs. I nattered on a bit about my old bulldog that I'd had when Holmes and I first met, then noticed the Professor's air of abstract concentration. It was similar, I noticed, to Holmes' own attitude of thought, but different. Where Holmes ofttimes seemed to be asleep as he listened to a client's statement, Professor Grey had adopted an almost catatonic stillness, only his eyes moving- focused beyond us at the wall. Only a bookshelf was there, so I doubted he was contemplating that with such intensity. Thornby watched his employer and hardly seemed to breathe. Holmes too, seemed to sense that something was afoot. He leaned forward in his chair, laying aside his pipe. I was unsurprised to note that a holder sprouted from that versatile tabletop to support the pipe. The moment passed, the Professor seem to come to himself. Frankly, I had wondered if I should offer medical assistance to him, but he recovered and spoke before I could move.

"Thornby, remind me to give you a raise in pay," Grey said.

"You don't pay me in money, now," replied Thornby. "I have access to whatever amount that I need from the working fund you've set up."

"Double it," Grey said. "I've been thinking about what you suggested- placing tracers on the thieves' targets."

"Can it be done?" Holmes asked.

"Not directly, no. Not as the problem is stated. However, I perceive a way to do it indirectly... There is no way to put any type of useful tracer on any of the original items in the museum. Any space traveler would be able to detect it right away."

"On the originals, you say? But that does not exhaust the possibilities, does it?"

"That's right, Holmes. You see it already, don't you?"

"If the originals cannot possibly be made traceable," Holmes said, "then perhaps your own perfect copies could be modified in such a way for them to be traceable?"

"Exactly, we place edited copies- with built-in tracers -in the British Museum for Jones to steal. Then we follow the trace from Jones, through to his fence, to the eventual buyer. By then we should know what sort of Authorities to call in to take them all in hand."

"Capital!" I exclaimed. "But how are we to place these copies in the museum?"

"Elementary, my dear Watson," Holmes replied calmly. "We have to rob the museum, ourselves, before Jones can be allowed to do so."

**********

"I missed breakfast," Thornby announced. "Could we take a break for lunch?"

"Certainly," the Professor replied, signaling the waiter. "The food here is excellent, by the way gentlemen. Order anything that you would like. I'm sure the kitchen is up to your challenge."

"Henry," said Thornby to our blue-skinned waiter. "We need to eat something to soak up all of this alcohol. I'll have a deluxe omelette, biscuits, gravy, and strong, black coffee. Doctor?"

"Roast beef, please. With carrots, potatoes, and onions. I hope that proves to be no trouble."

"None at all, sir. An appropriate wine?"

"Whatever you say, I am at your mercy there."

"Mr. Holmes?"

"Breakfast does have its appeal at the moment, I must say. Bacon, eggs, toast, marmalade... Coffee!, Yes, coffee!"

"Very good sir. And you, sir?"

"Hot and sour soup, House Special fried rice with Zalloo-koosh shrimp, and Henry?"

"Yes sir?"

"If you feel up to the performance, Moo Shoo Pork, please. I shall drink tea."

"Very good, sir. Ten minutes, please."

After he left, I inquired about our waiter. "Henry?" I asked. "His name is Henry?"

"Actually, he wears a translating device that changes our words into his own language. Whenever we say the word Henry, he hears his own name. When he speaks to us in return, the translator gives us his words in whatever language that it has heard us speaking. The language has to be already known to the device, naturally."

"But how can such a thing operate? And," I asked, "what of its size? I did not see Henry carrying so much as a cigarette case."

"His hearing-aid, Watson," replied Holmes. "I further surmise that the speaker for the device is that which is strapped to his left wrist."

"Almost perfect, Holmes," said Thornby. "The ear-piece is his end of the translator, and the wrist-talker is our end. The two are parts of one machine, and communicate to each other by a type of wireless. Most species use something similar."

"Old technology," said the Professor. "The trick is to keep updating the devices with new languages. Each machine's memory for that sort of thing is quite finite, however. New ways of storing information are then constantly being invented to keep up with the pressures of more and more information needing to be stored for quick access. Necessity keeps being met by ingenuity, and thus progress is made. All in all, a good analogy for all types of progress and invention."

The waiter then brought our meal. Everything was cooked to perfection and we all dug in with relish. I shall never forget seeing Henry prepare the Professor's main course. The meats and vegetables were laid within a soft, flat bread- similar to a tortilla. Plum sauce was basted on the filling, and the whole was wrapped by means of chopsticks, and placed decoratively upon the plate. It was indeed a performance to behold. The scent was quite pleasing, as was that of all the foods. We ate quietly, doing justice as trenchermen to our fine meals before we spoke again.

A quiet beeping tone from the Professor's typewriter device sounded just as we were all pushing out respective plates away, so to speak. The Professor studied the words written upon the window of his device, then sighed with what I hoped was relief. "There are no signs that Cyrus Jones is a time traveler. Such travel leaves traces, certain sub-atomic particles and radiations... None of these are to be found near Jones."

"Good," exclaimed Thornby. "That's one problem down. We're dealing with alien worlds contemporary to your own. Now there's no need to search all of time and space. Much narrower list of possibles for Jones to be from."

"Exactly," said Grey. "But wait, there is more-"

"'How much would you pay?'"

"Thornby?"

"Yes, boss?"

"Your sense of humor is quite likely to be the death of you... Quite possibly at my own hands, this very afternoon. Please restrain yourself."

"Yes, sir."

"Jones has been traced to a warehouse in a remote area of London. There he interacted with a small number of people who were at work preparing forged paintings and books. His base in London, gentlemen. And furthermore! He was traced on two occasions when he had to leave the planet and visit his ship in orbit about Earth's moon. It would have been too easy to find the ship if it had circled the Earth, itself. Those two trips revealed that Jones does seem to have access to some type of matter transmitter, but it is no time machine. I shall, of course, attempt to trace Jones' ship to its homeworld. Our task has just become lighter, gentlemen."

"Yeah," replied Thornby sarcastically. "Now all we have to do is run off a copy of an entire museum, let it be robbed, and follow the thief to the buyers. No problem... But what'll we do for an encore?"

"It does sound like an awful amount of work to be done in such a short time," I said.

"Already in progress," the Professor said whilst typing.

"That is correct, Watson," said Holmes. "Time has ceased to be an enemy- Indeed, it is now our greatest ally!"

"What do you mean, Holmes?"

"Why Watson, you realize of course that the Professor is a past master in the manipulation of time? He has, no doubt, just set in motion the necessary recording of the entire British Museum. The building and all of the contents will soon be recorded upon a crystal of purest diamond. This recording will be made into copies which will have an inherent flaw, to wit; our tracer, as part of the very structure of the artwork, and completely undetectable to Jones."

"Indeed Doctor," said Grey. "Imagine yourself to be upon the stage in some grand, darkened theater... Suddenly, in a far balcony, someone strikes a match- the only light in a dark and cavernous room. This is what the tracers will look like to my equipment. They will stand out like beacons in the darkness, for my machines will only look for the type of light, their signal, that they will give off- They alone of all creation. We will be able to track Jones' every step, or at least the movements of the stolen goods. And the true beauty of the situation? That since Jones cannot move about in time and yet we can, then he has only eleven days to prepare- and is stuck upon Earth of the nineteen hundreds, while we have unlimited time available to us! We can travel back to any point, after having passed as long as we've needed to have used in making our preparations. We can spend years for every day that Jones has to use and still arrive on time to catch him."

"The irony is delicious," replied Holmes in a droll voice. "From our seats here, in a comfortable club, we are able to effect changes in what occurred four hundred and eighteen years ago. Whatever problem we face, the solution occurs at the time we need it to. Each move of our foe is checked. All because of his pride! If it were not for the hubris of Jones, hiring me as not only some sort of cover, but to remove Guiles Thornby from Jones' own path, we would not now be able to put paid to the villain himself, nor yet discover his master. If Moriarty were not resting in Hell at this moment, I would not be a bit surprised to find out that the ultimate villain is he."

"No," said the Professor. "Our ultimate foe is someone quite beyond the late, un-lamented James Moriarty, in scope and in power. I suspect that what we are looking at here is nothing less than a contract theft. An underground art collector has commissioned this crime. He will be rich beyond measure, bored beyond belief, and willing to undertake any risk for these art treasures. He prefers to work through underlings, like Jones, rather than risk his own skin. His most pressing trait will no doubt turn out to be the desire to add to his collection. He will risk anything to add another painting or book to his shelves. No, I understand him all too well. I've walked in his shoes... I know how he thinks. If it were not an accident of birth, I could have been him- whoever he turns out to be. I was simply lucky enough to have been born upon a world of time travelers, and so the galaxy is an open book to me."

"It runs deeper than that," asked Holmes, "does it not, Professor? I would say that the difference between yourself and our foe is more one of character. You are not, at heart, a thief. Our unknown foe, however, indeed is."

"Mr. Holmes, by the laws of my own people my hands are not entirely clean, I must admit. On my own world, I am branded somewhat of a renegade. Not a wanted man, but rather the reverse- an un-official exile. For over ten million years before my birth, my people have been able to travel in time. In our early records, there is listed every possible abuse of this technology. But, there is also listed every possible humane usage- The matters balance out, yet the guilt remains. In time, my people learned from their mistakes and vowed never again to interfere in the destiny of other worlds. It was a harsh lesson, one that cost many lives on other worlds, but one that we learned well. The urge to play 'god' to younger worlds was all but erased from our character as a species. Despite our intent, a civilization destroyed itself because of our meddling with their natural development. Our civilization was in shock and remorse for a generation. The lesson was learned; observe, record, remember... but never interfere. Only the odd throw-back shows any evidence of an urge to meddle. I fled my home to escape what I perceived to be a tyranny of stifling rules. Non-conformity was subtly punished, individual expression was looked down upon as anti-social. It was a gradual erosion of what had been a great civilization. Many centuries passed thus before the time of which I speak. Finally the laws against interfering with other worlds, against everything but observing them, began to leave younger worlds than ours open to invasions or decay. I was neither the first nor the last to flee. In every generation, a few were born that could not live with the boredom, the restrictions, who had to act- to flee. Some have meddled, some have muddled the waters of history, and I have sought to study and learn. A rare few of my fellows have turned out to be just the sort of ruthless danger that the others fear. There is no warrant for my extradition for any crimes, but if I draw attention to myself- if I embarrass them -my homeworld's government will be forced to take official notice of me."

"Thank you for that confidence, Professor. You have confirmed several of my theories and given me much food for thought."

For the first time, I wondered at the true motives of the Professor and Guiles Thornby. If the museum robbery was now going to be of a totally false museum- Where did the pieces that were, originally, never recovered go to? And what of the false museum itself? As if in a bad play, this prop will never be needed again- What will become of it? What about... "What about the guards? Or Curators who are working late? Will they be copied also?"

"No, Doctor. The equipment is set to ignore living things. I would not endanger anyone needlessly." The Professor sounded reassuring, but could he be believed? Could he really be Jones' hidden employer after all? I wished that I could get Holmes alone for a few moments and sound him out on the matter. Aside from the bewildering array of machinery and concepts that we had been exposed to, Holmes and I were forced to take these two at their word. I knew that Holmes had been able to see further into these strangers than I. If there were just some way that we could converse unheard.

"Gentlemen, I think the time has come for a visit to the facilities- If I may be so rude. All this coffee... Watson, do you feel up to exploring a sanitary closet of four hundred years in our future? Thank you. If you will excuse us, gentlemen?"

"Holmes," I said as we proceeded toward the chamber that the bartender had pointed out to us. "Some times its as if you read my very mind... You knew that I wanted to ask your conclusions about the Professor and whether he could be trusted."

"Yes, I could see your rising distress as our host unburdened himself to me. I closely observed you whilst he was speaking and saw the train of thought that had been engaged. After a point, you began to wonder at the true motives of our host and what I might make of him. You then fidgeted, attempting to hide your distress, until I saw that you had reached the point of suggesting the most obvious gambit of a trip to the jakes. I thereupon made the statement myself so as to disassociate the event from your own movements. Quite elementary."

"Quite, I'm sure. Holmes! Tell me! Can the man be trusted?" We thereupon entered the rest room and I have to admit that there was not another word passed between us for some minutes. The place was quite astounding, more like the locker rooms of a club than a simple WC. After finding the facilities we sought, we again convened in what could pass for a lobby, just inside the door back to the bar.

"Your question answers itself, Watson. Can the man be trusted? The man. You know that he is actually no closer to being a 'man' than we are to being oak trees, or oysters. Yet you see him as a man. He acts like a man, looks like a man, speaks as a man- so he is easier to accept than, for example, our waiter- who's differences are openly visible. You accept the Professor for what he appears to be, Watson. Yet you ask for my conclusions? The man exudes an aura of trustworthiness. I have detected no signals being passed between Thornby and the Professor, as would be present if they were trying to dupe us in some way. To be brief- I believe them, Watson. I think that just as Lestrade and Gregson were to be trusted as allies, so can Thornby and the Professor. There are yet a few pieces to the puzzle to be uncovered and we will be ready to take Jones in hand."

"And deliver him where?"

"To whomever has jurisdiction over his peculiar crime. We will find that out shortly. Come Watson, the game is still afoot!"

**********

Guiles and the Professor were jubilant when we rejoined them.

"The copy is done and the overlay to the museum is in place, ready for the night of the robbery," said the Professor as Holmes and I seated ourselves. "This also explains Thornby's difficulties, Holmes. At the time that you were watching him, he did not know that he was trying to make copies of copies. Naturally, the equipment that he had didn't work correctly. Also, he thought that several people were dogging his footsteps-besides Jones, of course -they all turned out to be you, in various disguises."

"What is an 'overlay'? I have not heard the term before," I said.

"Excellent question, Watson. Obviously it is the entrance to our trap, but I must confess that I am unfamiliar with the usage of the word, myself. I would surmise that it is a false entrance to the British Museum that leads into the false copy, rather than into the real museum. Thus we do not have to actually carry away the entire museum and replace it with our false one. We simply insure that no matter where Jones chooses to make his entry, it is into our trap and not the real museum that he gains entry."

"Exactly so, Holmes," said the Professor. "We couldn't very well steal the whole museum away and replace it with our copy. No, the real museum is still there and safe. But no matter which door or window Jones and his men use, our trap is waiting behind. In a way, you could say that our overlay is between the real world and the real museum, like the skin of an onion or the shell of a nut."

"Yes," added Thornby. "Now all we do is wait for Jones to take the bait and the trap is sprung! We even have a lead on his ship's registry, so we can begin the search for the proper authorities to turn him over to."

"Excellent news," exclaimed Holmes. "I take it that we can proceed against Jones whenever the search for the proper police agency is successful?"

"Exactly, Holmes," said Thornby. "That's all that we lack to bring the man in."

"A bit more waiting, I'm afraid," added the Professor. After a glance towards his typewriter, he expanded his statement. "I never thought that I'd see the like of this- Where the search for a policeman takes up more time than finding a thief. But there, in a nutshell, is all that we need for the case to conclude. We can collect Jones at will, once the results of this last search are in."

"Doughnut shop..." blurted out Guiles, trying to stifle giggles. The Professor ignored his outburst with massive dignity.

"I wonder if I need a Siberian wooly mammoth for my collection," mused the Professor mysteriously, while staring at Thornby. "Not a dead one frozen in ice, but a live one- up and about?"

"I'll be good," announced Thornby, under the glare of his employer's eye.

The evening wore on, though we had all had a good time, we were all relieved when the Professor's typewriter beeped again in signal that the correct other-worldly police agency had been found to deal with Jones. Now we could proceed against him. Our trap was set, the bait placed, now we had but to go and collect our prize.

"Gentlemen," said Holmes when the signal had come in and its import understood. "The game, is well and truly afoot. As soon as Jones takes the bait, the locations of the missing artwork should appear unto the Professor's equipment. We can then move against him with the aid of his own world's police. I propose a final toast before we repair to the British Museum. To Cyrus Jones, may he find that prison suits him well."

"Hear, hear!" we all echoed.

**********

Yet, it was not fated to be the moment that we laid Jones by the heels. As our final preparations were enacted, we hung upon the Professor's every word as he quoted from his typewriter. We listened as Jones and his hirelings entered the Museum by stealth, as they then entered what the Professor termed an "overlay" that was our false museum- hall, to trigger the trap and make good the their theft of the first load of works smuggled away from the museum. As they began the second truck load, The police of Jones' own world as, well as our own agents that we had alerted struck, the hirelings were arrested, Jones detained... And then disaster struck. It was Holmes who had the first inkling of trouble.

"Something is not right," Holmes muttered. "It has been too easy. Our ultimate foe should not have given up his agent so quickly. Jones should have been more hesitant..."

"Holmes," said Thornby. "Against this set-up, he hasn't the ghost of a chance." Famous last words... The Professor's typewriter gave of a warning sound of a quite different tone and we all whipped 'round to give him our attention.

"Ghost is right, by thunder! This isn't physically possible! I had his every avenue of escape covered! He vanished! He escaped his own world's detective agents," shouted the Professor. "While they separated him from his local help that the Yard was taking in tow, he somehow managed to give them the slip! He's gone from my instruments entirely! Holmes- How did you know?"

"Results without causes are much more impressive. I am afraid that my explanation may disillusion you, but it has always been my habit to hide none of my methods, either from my friend Watson of from anyone who might take an intelligent interest in them. Very well, to put the matter concisely; I have had the advantage of observing Jones for some weeks... As of tonight, I have now had the honour of observing Mr. Thornby- out of his disguise, so to speak. I have noticed several similarities in their behaviour and mannerisms. Without taking the time to list them, I can say that the indications are that Jones is also in disguise, from a time or place of very high technology, and also is as familiar with several of the amenities of your present day as is Mr. Thornby. Therefore, it is clear to me that despite the evidence of your equipment, Jones is no stranger to these modern times of yours. One drawback of an active mind is that one can always conceive alternate explanations which would make our scent a false one. Thus we fell into the trap of the attractive, but false, scent of Jones' employer being contemporary to the crime. We ignored the possibility that Jones' employer may be able to deceive our instruments- to make them give false results. He was underestimated. We must redouble our efforts with this new information and avoid the false premise that our enemy is bound to one era of time. I suggest that we extend our search for the stolen artwork into the future, if your equipment is able to do so. Our foe may be from some point in the future rather than contemporary with the crime itself. All is not yet lost... Consider- He has escaped, but with our traceable copies rather than the originals. Therefore, we will trace him- but how long will it take?"

"It will take as much as thirty minutes for the last of the changes in time made by the tracers to be detectable to my instruments," sighed the Professor. "Once we eliminate the past as a hunting ground, Mr. Holmes, I will then take your suggestion to heart. The future is a much harder thing to search... I hope that we can at least confine the search to the present day era. We shall see."

"These are much deeper waters than I had thought," said Holmes. "When once your point of view is changed, the very thing which was so damning becomes a clue to the truth. I am as much guilty of underestimating our foe as anyone. It positively galls me that Jones got away so easily. He felt so clever and so sure of himself that he imagined no one could touch him. He could say to any suspicious contemporary neighbor, 'Look at the steps I have taken. I have consulted not only the police, but even Sherlock Holmes.' Thus he prepared an alibi for the men of the Yard. All the cards are at present against us. In our own time, that is. Here, we may yet have some ability to act."

"Thornby," said the Professor quietly. "Go back to the Museum- my Museum, Castle of the Winds -and contact Maxwell. He is the one agent that could possibly keep up with Jones as he makes his escape. Pull Maxwell back from whatever he is doing and re- assign him to the period that yourself, Jones, and Holmes were doing your dance in the British Museum. I want him ready to follow Jones when he makes his escape from those Tourlanatti Customs agents. Follow Jones- No matter where, no matter when, tell him. You understand."

"Boss? Aren't you-"

"Then message every last scout and bring them in on the matter. Have them look for the tagged items, watch Jones' ship orbiting the moon, and keep an ear on Maxwell's reports. When Jones escapes, Maxwell can follow him... Perhaps better than anyone. I want this Jones, and his employer, in jail... No back talk, Thornby. There will be a door to Castle of the Winds behind the bar by now. I summoned one while we were speaking. Go to it, Guiles. Get everyone moving- We're not going to let ourselves get caught lagging a second time."

"Yes sir," said Thornby. Then he got up and walked to the bar, only to disappear behind it a moment later. I could swear that the door that he went through had not been there earlier.

"Holmes," said the Professor. "It appears to me that I have not paid sufficient attention to your deductions. To my chagrin, I find myself empty-handed when I was sure that I would have my thief in custody by now. I promise that I will not make that mistake again. Tell me, what are your views of our enemy? Not just Jones, but his employer. I need to make plans against him, and I want to make the correct plans this time."

"Holmes," I said. "Have you seen enough of Jones to extrapolate what his employer must be like?"

"Indeed, I can say that I have come to a few tentative conclusions about our elusive enemy. He is not unlike a director of a play, or perhaps better yet- a chess player. Yes, that is it! A chess player! He has his board set, his pieces in place. He sees the moves of all the pieces on the board and is able to deduce our possible moves from our position on the board so far. If I may term it so, then this agent of yours, Maxwell, is to represent our knight- striking from odd angles and around corners. Thornby and I are bishops- angling about Jones and seeking to immobilize him. Watson here is a sturdy pawn, awaiting the moment to throw his strength into the play. And you sir, are our king- whose subtle moves need to be protected from our opponent."

"Rather, Maxwell is our queen- able to travel any distance, in any direction, and strike our foe deep in the heart of his own territory," the Professor corrected Holmes gently. "Otherwise, your analogy is perfect. My scouts therefore become our knights, rooks, and the rest of our pawns."

"Thank you for the clarification," said Holmes. "Now for our opponent; He is at or near your own level of technology and ability. He may turn out to be the only possessor of our stolen goods, rather than a fence for them. In fact, I am sure that he will not wish to sell the items to another after going to such extremes to possess them himself. He will be vastly wealthy, for such a hobby cannot be cheaply maintained. He will be used to circumventing the law, thus this is not his first crime, but rather his latest. He will have a substantial organization to command- We may need to be on our guard against assassins -and will be quite ruthless in his discipline of his organization's members. I would suggest a search for the names of the most wealthy art collectors who have demonstrated a casual disregard for the law in the past. He may tend to specialize his collection to items from either Earth particularly, or from emerging worlds such as Earth. He will not be outwardly ostentatious in his dress, manner, or residence, but he will often disappear from these familiar things to command his secret army from some hidden fast-hold. He may or may not be insane, as I understand the definition, for he may be so alien as to think that his actions are not wrong, but if theft is wrong for his people then he stands a better chance of being considered insane. Professor Grey? It comes to me that if the stolen items were all from our copy of the museum and that the real museum has not been robbed, why was there a report listing the stolen items?"

"Well Holmes, the Yard had to say something about the raid that netted the local gang. None of them got away, unlike Jones. As for the missing items, I had a crew remove them to various of the museum's own storage facilities, but I did not alter the museum's own inventory sheets- so they still have the items, but do not yet know that they have them. The things are simply lost in the system. Once the originals were safe, I anchored the overlay on the copies that were on my list as having never been recovered. The museum looked normal to the naked eye, but the overlay was there all the same. Each copy hung or lay where it's original had, each tagged for our detection. I feel sure that the tags will yet become visible to us."

"But what precisely is the overlay, Professor? I feel rather stupid here," I said grumpily. It is true, in this alien, future world I felt like a backward savage. I had gawked at buildings, I had goggled at the colours of the skins of the human-looking aliens, I panicked at the sight of the non-human creatures. It was only here in this very normal-seeming environment that I was able to escape the sensations of being madly ripped from the familiar. In fear, let it be known, I sought information, the better to cope with the truth of my present location.

"Doctor, the overlay is what I call the area of over-lap of the copy of the museum that we recorded and edited, and the real museum. The real museum is unharmed, unchanged, safe from Jones and his gang. The copy... The copy is partly inside of the real museum, partly outside the real museum- like a second skin -and partly- mostly -in another dimension that is very close to your own, but separate from it by the smallest margin. If the overlay were of a street corner somewhere in London, people on the sidewalks could walk in and back out of it without noticing any change. They would travel from one dimension to another without noticing. As far as our trap goes, in effect, Jones could walk into the front door of the museum, and- in the space of the thickness of the doorway -walk into our copy of the museum instead of the real thing. We would intercept him in the course of traversing the doorway, so to speak."

"Professor, have any of the tagged items yet shown up upon your search engines?"

"No Holmes, and they should have. There has now been plenty of objective time to pass for the tags on the artworks to effect their changes in the past. No matter where or when they are now, my machines should have found them. For someone to shield the tracers from my instruments is highly unlikely. In fact, it would be more probable that the villain is from farther in the future than we are right now, than it is for my instruments to be blinded to the tracer tags being anywhen between now and the dawn of creation. The past is fairly fixed- and thus easier to scan, the future is harder for the same reason that it would be harder to track one speck of dust in a desert sandstorm... Too many possible changes make the future more fluid than the past. Plus, each dimension has it's own past and future. Time is as infinite sideways as it is forward and back..." the Professor trailed off as if in sudden inspiration. "The energy necessary to cross time or dimensions would be traceable to my instruments if they knew what sorts of energy to look for... Perhaps we could come at them sideways, so to speak, by locating sources of energy affecting the British Museum on the night in question. Another thing to add to Maxwell's programming when he reports."

"Holmes? What you were saying earlier," I asked. "Didn't you imply that the enemy would have a stronghold somewhere?"

"Why yes Watson, so I did. You have a thought upon the matter? Out with it, old man. Professor, Watson is known for making intuitive leaps that ofttimes outstrip my own deductions. He is capable of the imagination so lacking in Lestrade and Gregson. Come Watson, what was your thought?"

"Well, I don't know about all that guff, Holmes, but thank you. But my thoughts on the enemy were that if he did indeed have a fortress somewhere, and if indeed he was able to travel in time..."

"Stout fellow!" exclaimed Holmes. "Go on, I think I see it, but make it clear for me."

"Well, would not this base require a lot of the very energies the Professor's machinery also uses? Could we not look for these energies in use and compare them with the list of wealthy art collectors who have been found to be possessed of criminal connections? A name upon both lists would be further evidence of guilt, to my mind."

"Watson, you continue to amaze me," said Holmes. "Professor, Watson has raised a valid point that may ease our search. Can you trace someone who has abilities and tools like your own?"

"Absolutely, Holmes! In fact, I usually have just such a program running in the background on my museum's computers. It is somewhat of a security program, you see. I use it to track potential hazards of my own. My fellows from my home world, various warlords, invasions, revolutions, and other occurrences that may affect one of my archaeological digs..."

"Splendid! Instruct this marvelous 'program' with our observations so far and let us see what we may see."

"Holmes, Watson, this investigation shall take much more subjective time than I originally envisioned. I know that my people will perform as instructed... Shall we repair to the outer room to await results? I know that there are a lot of people out there who would like to meet the both of you. In fact, I just received a message from Trixie, the waitress that Thornby said you met on your way in... A message that threatens my very life if she is not permitted to make your acquaintance," the Professor laughed heartily. "Please, to avoid the ire of a beautiful woman, would you mind terribly?"

"Oh very well," sighed Holmes. But I could tell from his manner that his ego had been peaked by the thought of others that valued his work. Or perhaps it was just the memory of the short skirt and long legs of Trixie. Holmes may have avoided female entanglements all his life, but the man who could ignore a summons from that young lady had yet to be born, I surmised. That woman could inspire a statue to embarrassment, I believe. To my delight, Holmes accepted the Professor's request and I once more found myself in that formidable crowd of patrons in the large room outside our comfy nook. Again I could examine the variety of life forms from distant worlds. Here, a winged snake conversed with a woman made of flame, there two blubbery individuals not unlike walruses hooted and bellowed to one another. In another place, a woman who appeared to be made of liquid silver sat, nude, conversing with a green-skinned man in purple robes. In yet another place, a school of small fish swam in the very air over one table, while their companion appeared to be a sphinx who was drinking some glowing, ale- like beverage. I saw many more patrons who appeared to be human in every way, as well as several who's bodies looked human in shape but possessed wildly varying colours of skin and hair.

As if sensing my distress, Holmes began asking questions of the Professor- "Professor Grey, these strange creatures..."

"Are all to be considered people, Holmes, Doctor. They are but a few of the strange shapes that life has moulded into intelligence. On a busy day, the Mare Inebrium will serve several hundred different life-forms... They could range in size from sprites who could stand in the palm of your hand, to beings larger than whales. The Mare even has other rooms for beings who need special atmospheres... As you have seen, this main room has various smaller, more intimate rooms with differing themes. We were just in the Club, Piper's its beginning to be called- Not sure why. Across the room near the center of the wall is an entrance to rooms that have a 'raw frontier' set of themes. More saloons than anything like the Club. One of them, the Red Dog Saloon, can get a bit rough, at times."

"Professor? Why are there such a predominance of Earth-like people here? Is the human form to dominate above others in all the worlds? From my studies, I had rather thought that the chance of any person from another world appearing to pass for the next-door neighbor were rather slim. Once I accepted that Watson and I were traveling to another world, I expected the un-Earthly shapes of some of our fellow beings. Why then are there so many human-like aliens?" Holmes' question, once asked, aroused my curiosity as well. I waited eagerly for the reply.

"Why no, Holmes. There are many more non-human types of life than there are humanoids. There is nothing special about the shape that houses an intelligence. Indeed, humanoids- Earth humans in particular -are widespread, but they are far outnumbered by the other variety of intelligent beings. The sample that you see here is decidedly weighted in the favor of humanoids simply because this world is extremely well suited for them. This world has become an important shipping port and this city itself is a tourist attraction, in a small way. There are important diplomatic Embassies here, from dozens of worlds. A lot of the Diplomats come here, simply because we can accommodate so many differing life forms. There's one now, matter of fact. Let's go meet him."

I look to where the Professor was indicating and froze. I was shocked for a moment, then I recovered. I took a sip of the drink that I'd thoughtfully retained from our table at the Club. The being that we were now walking toward to meet was none other than the giant scorpion that I had glimpsed earlier in the Club. I had not forgotten the waiter addressing him as "Sir", nor had I forgotten the bartender's voice calling the creature "Brigadier". As we approached the creature, I re-thought my estimate of his size. Rather than being in any way elephantine, the creature's body was more the size of a Clydesdale, or a Percheron horse. Its body was about shoulder height from the floor, supported by eight graceful legs- though the claws on his two arms were each as long as my shoulders are wide. He appeared to have two bright-blue eyes, on stalks above his mouth. I noticed that he had a small black and chrome box on his right arm, near the shoulder. The box was labeled in English, for I could read the word "Fender" emblazoned like a trademark upon the box. I took this to be the being's translator device. He wore a wide blue sash from his left front shoulder to his hind-most right hip- If a scorpion could be said to have a hip. I could see small ribbons and medals pinned to this sash. That would make sense if indeed this creature was a soldier of high rank. But the Professor had indicated that this being was a diplomat of some sort. And I recalled Thornby saying that this creature was several centuries old, yet middle-aged.

"Kazsh-ak Teir, old D'rrish, I'd like you to meet someone," said the Professor, once we had walked close to the giant scorpion. "Kazsh-ak Teir, Ambassador of the D'rrish colony upon Bethdish- May I present Mr. Sherlock Holmes and Dr. John Watson, of London, upon Earth."

The creature turned and quirked up an eyestalk in what I took to be surprise at the names of Holmes and myself. His movements were quite graceful- for a creature that size. Yet I could not forget his stinger as it arched eight feet in the air behind him. "It is indeed a great honour," came a deep voice from out of the Fender-box. "I have read all of the good Doctor's publishings of your cases, Mr. Holmes. It is a pleasure to meet you. Dr. Watson, I thank you for many hours of pleasurable reading. What, may I ask, brings you forward to our fair city? Grey, have you been meddling again?"

"I am pleased to make your acquaintance, Mr. Ambassador. Watson and I are visiting this world upon a case. The Professor was kind enough to assist us in the attempt to apprehend an art thief. Although we have yet to be successful... At the moment, we are awaiting results of a search- and thus taking a break from our labours. You do not seem surprised by the fact of our traveling in time, Sir. May I ask why?"

"Please, call me Kazsh-ak. I prefer to shed the carapace of diplomacy when I am here. This is the place I come to relax, away from the worries of the Embassy. As to your question, sir- When I see Grey in the company of someone not of this time, I feel no surprise. I have known his man Thornby for nearly a century now. The two of us have shared many adventures together. I have also assisted Grey on several other matters myself, over the years. Nothing that involves Professor Grey surprises me any longer. Pleases me, amazes me, amuses me, but no more surprises."

"I see," said Holmes.

"I overheard the barman in the Club call you 'Brigadier'..." I said. "You left the military for the diplomatic corps?"

"A bit of a family obligation, I'm afraid," replied Kazsh-ak. "My family is one of the more obscure lineages of our people's royal family. As a minor son of a minor house, I inherited the mantle of the diplomatic corps upon my retirement from the City Guard. It fell to our line to become diplomats, you see. Runs in the family, don't you know. Although- my fourteenth daughter has been selected the twelfth Princess of the present Royal family. Something less than twenty steps from the throne in the line of succession, but highly unlikely to ever have to assume the responsibility. I am in partial retirement from the diplomatic corps at the moment, myself, and she has assumed most of my duties at the Embassy. She will eventually hand over the post to my youngest son when he comes of age and finishes his training. Of course, that will not be for sixty years or so. Gentlemen, I fear that I must repair to the bar to obtain another beverage. I would be honoured if you would accompany me."

"A pleasure, Sir," I replied. I had recovered from my fear of this odd person, and was beginning to enjoy his company.

"Yes," added Holmes. "I fear that we have unfinished business with a young barmaid who is threatening mayhem if she is ignored for much longer."

"Yes," I said innocently. "That would be Miss Trixie."

"Steady Watson!" Holmes quipped, smiling. "The fairer sex has always been your main weakness."

"I am used to such outpourings," I replied with mock dignity. "And so I simply consider the source and dismiss the remark as being from one... inexperienced, shall we say, in such matters." I grinned at Holmes to show that my reposte' was meant in humour. To the best of my knowledge, Holmes has only ever felt the tenderer emotions towards two women in his life. Of course, the most intense of these was The Woman, Miss Adler, of my Bohemian Scandal story. Holmes never forgot her as having bested him at his own game- As well as acquitting herself honourably in the situation. At least, she did so in my esteem. Holmes and I were young yet, then. I'm sure now that the Irene Adler of that time would not stand a chance against the present Holmes. Yet still, at any mention of her, for the rest of his life, he toyed with the sovereign that she tipped him whilst he was in disguise and drafted as a witness to her hurried marriage to Godfrey Norton. He had carried that coin as a fob upon his watch chain from that day unto this.

The other? Holmes has yet to see fit to inform me officially, so I fear that I must keep my own deductions on the matter to myself. As a gentleman, it is not my place to gossip, nor to drop hints for some later pseudo-scholar to dissect. Suffice it to say that Holmes was not really as celibate as my stories in the magazines might lead one to believe. The Other Woman- if I may coin a term -who had engaged Holmes' affections over the years is someone who's privacy Holmes protects with commendable chivalry. We never speak of the matter at all, he and I. I know of her, he is aware that I know, and that is all that needs be said upon the matter. Unless Holmes himself deigns to speak out, my lips are sealed. Yet we joke to each other, such is our friendship.

"Yes, well..." Holmes said.

"The human male who can say no to Trixie has yet to be born," observed Kazsh-ak. "The maiden hath charms to soothe the savage... ah, beast." The Ambassador laughed, or at least, a laugh issued from the Fender-box that he wore. For some reason, the accent spoken by his translator device left me feeling slightly home-sick. He sounded so very much like any bluff and hearty gentleman from some ministry of the government in London. I liked his kindly tone of voice, for all the fact that the voice came out of a box.

"In fact," observed Grey. "Here is the lady herself. Trixie, you're looking lovely this evening."

"Thank you, Professor. Mr. Holmes, Dr. Watson," she said as we approached the main bar. "It is such a pleasure to meet you both. I've admired your work for so long."

"Not too long, I'm sure," said Holmes. "For you cannot yet be much over twenty five years of age at the most. I take it that you have read the Doctor's romanticized accounts of some of my cases?"

"Oh, yes! I've read everything that Dr. Watson ever wrote. And I looked up a few of your own monographs in the library as well, Mr. Holmes. I'm a great fan! My boyfriend Max is a fan too. Aren't you Max?"

The gentleman in question was a handsome fellow behind the bar. He laughed and introduced himself to Holmes and I.

"Yes," he answered Trixie. "I've always like mysteries. Dr. Watson's accounts always let Mr. Holmes' methods shine with their true worth. I always enjoyed trying to pick out the clues as Holmes did, each time I re-read one of Watson's stories. The two of you have led me to countless hours of thought. Thank you."

"My pleasure, I'm sure," I said.

"Quite," added Holmes. "It is gratifying to note that Watson and myself are apparently held in such high esteem some three hundred-odd years after our eventual demise."

"Most people never get to know what the future thinks of them," said Max. "Call yourselves lucky that you were such a positive force in history. Almost everyone, anywhere has seen or read one of the Doctor's accounts of one of Holmes' cases. 'Hound of the Baskerville's' is the most common."

"I'm not unduly proud of that one," I mused. "It is one of my finer efforts, I think. I managed to capture the atmosphere of the moor and the hound without resorting to the supernatural for drama. Holmes leaving me to think that I was alone whilst he himself was camping upon the moor added a nice touch. Even nicer because it was real. Holmes always did have a flair for the dramatic."

"Watson, you can always be proud of your work," said Holmes. "If I have at times accused you of stooping to romance when recounting one of my little problems, rest assured that I knew that your accounts were the best way of placing my methods before the public eye. You have always been able to speak to the man in the street with your pen, Watson. I applaud your talents even as you have applauded my own efforts upon the violin."

I answered such unaccustomed praise in the only manner which I could. I gave Holmes a slight bow, and smiled proudly. I treasured my friend's opinion above all others. Even as I made further smalltalk with Trixie and Max, I felt the warmth of my friend's words in my heart.

"Polios," began Max- but at a look from the Professor he gulped and began again. "Grey, would you or your guests care for another drink. I see that the Doctor's glass is empty."

"I, for one, came up here just to get another round," said Kazsh-ak. "My usual, Max."

"Yes," added the Professor. "A round on the house in honour of Holmes' and Watson's visit. My treat..."

"Yes Sir!" snapped Max, passing glasses and pouring drinks. "The good stuff, for three hundred and fifty seven... Good thing that you own--"

"Max," said the Professor in a firm tone of voice.

"Yes sir, the customer is always right," Max replied suddenly. He, Trixie, and another waitress began passing out rounds of drinks. The other waitress was later introduced to me as Blanche. A thoroughly pleasant young lady, I found her to be. When the round was dispersed, we all rejoined in the conversation. We talked of many things besides my humble literary efforts, I am thankful to say. All that praise was likely to go to my head. Many strange and mysterious things were related to Holmes and myself over the course of the evening. I dare say that Holmes had begun to wish to have been born into these later times so as to be on hand to study those strange, new mysteries, by the time our evening was done. Holmes, I'm sure, enjoyed the attention. His vanity was always within easy reach, but this only made him look more normal. His thoughts, being so much more rapid that the average man's, tended to isolate him and make him appear aloof to those who did not know him well. I was particularly glad to note that Holmes and Trixie disappeared together for at least an hour. Trixie returned looking radiant, smiled at Max- who shrugged and smiled himself - then went on about her work. Holmes appeared about ten minutes later, looking very relaxed. I haven't the foggiest idea of what went on- And as a gentleman, I refuse to engage in idle speculation. I simply smiled to myself and never brought the matter up to Holmes at all. "I'll have to update that list," I muttered to myself.

**********

Yet, we were each of us glad, I think, when the Professor passed us word that his agent, Maxwell, had made good the pursuit of Jones. Thornby had returned some time earlier and sat at the bar- oddly anti-social of him, I thought. The Professor eventually spoke to him, then the two of them spoke to the bartender. After a whispered conversation with Max, the Professor led us behind the bar to a small office. Various mementos and photographs in the room led me to understand that the office belonged to Max. Moments after our arrival, there came a knock upon the door.

"Come..." the Professor said loudly.

The man that entered was tall and strongly built. His hair was short and dark, his features strangely regular and average. His eyes were of indeterminate colour, and reflected light oddly- such that I judged them to be artificial in some way. At the Professor's invitation, he sat. As he began to speak in well modulated tones, I noticed that he had nothing in the way of body-language. He exhibited an un-natural stillness, and some faint aura of menace- Not directed at us, but rather as if he were some elemental force, constrained to obedience.

"My report is inconclusive," he began. "I began by returning to the British Museum and observing Holmes, Jones, and Thornby during the time that they each watched the others. On the night of the theft, I concealed myself and recorded each movement Jones and his hirelings made in their robbery. I knew that the first load of artworks had to evade capture in order for our tracers to work, so I allowed it to leave unmolested. I did, however, test the tracer tags and mark the position of the stolen goods at all times. When the raid began, I followed Jones and the Tourlanatti Customs Agents and left the underlings to the locals. When Jones made his escape, I was ready and I successfully followed Jones to his hideaway. He first transported to his ship, transported the contents of the vehicle that had escaped with it's load to the ship, and got the ship underway. I followed him out of the system, where they met with another ship- a bigger, long-haul freighter -and transferred the cargo and Jones. The freighter has been tagged so that I can locate it again, by the way. The freighter proceeded along a course that would take it to Sigma Draconis, possibly to planets four or five, possibly just as an intermediate point to a further destination. I kept following the freighter. At Sigma Draconis four, Jones and the cargo transferred to different ships awaiting there and departed to separate locations. I followed Jones to a space station orbiting in an asteroid belt around a burned-out yellow dwarf star near Omicron Delta. There were seventy three other ships docked to the station when Jones arrived. Jones took a stateroom in the station and made no effort to communicate to anyone, that I could detect. I entered the station and observed Jones for several weeks as he remained there. As he made no move to collect payment for the theft or to contact any superiors, I felt it safe to assume that he was awaiting contact from his employer and feared to act further until contact was made. After another month passed, my observations of the shipping traffic of the station led me to believe that it was the waypoint of a vast smuggling ring. Jones was eventually met by a Tral-d-nex-coukh messenger, whereupon he immediately left on the next departing ship. That ship went to Proxima Agornius Seven, where Jones disembarked and attempted to loose himself in the native population. I tracked him to a small inn outside of the eleventh largest city on the planet. There, he received a credit voucher for the amount of 50 million credits by regular Interplanet Mail. Within minutes of this payment, Jones was accosted and beaten by a pair of thugs. He was not robbed, and the thugs told Jones that his master was not pleased with his performance. He was instructed to complete the mission and steal the rest of his targets from the British Museum. He left Proxima Agornius Seven the next day, nursing his wounds. Since he is restricted in his velocity by using contemporary shipping, I thought it prudent to return and report. I still have not found his employer, but in eighty weeks he will be back on Earth and again attempting to plunder the museum. I placed tracer tags on the thugs, but they were local talent and knew nothing of their ultimate employer."

"You did good, Maxwell," said Thornby. "How long have you been working on Jones since I contacted you this evening and sent you out?"

"I have been gone from Castle of the Winds for six years since this evening," Maxwell replied, as if he had just run down to the chemist's for a tin of tooth powder. "I was able to make much better time on the trip back. Jones spent five years in transit in various ships."

"Reminds me of a Saturday night in Toledo, Ohio," said Thornby. "I spent a week there, one day." He smiled for a minute, then grimaced. "Boss, there's something else. A report from the science team. They're getting a signal from one of the tracers... But there's something weird. They can't pin down it's location. And why just one?"

"Trap," said Maxwell. "Best approximation."

"Yes," replied the Professor. "Next would be that it is being constantly moved, next would be that it is being duplicated so perfectly that the tracer tag is being copied as well. I'll check Castle of the Winds' logs to see if anyone is using our own equipment. Frankly, I doubt it. My own people are either too loyal, or too well insulated, to need to stoop to theft. If they wanted to sell copies of artwork, why would they steal? Given the time, effort, resources, and knowledge that went into the museum robbery, for my own people it would have been just so much wasted time. They would have access to much greater resources. They could much more easily have diverted copies made from my own collections. Less chance of running up against Customs, much quicker money, much less effort. No, I doubt that it is an inside job. Still, I will check."

"Excellent Professor," said Holmes. "We must cover all of the possibilities. Mr. Maxwell, have you made provisions to keep Jones under surveilance while you are here?"

"Not necessary, I shall return to the moment that I left. For him, no time will pass that I am not watching."

"More of the Professor's machinery," I said. "Or am I mistaken?"

"No Doctor, you are quite right. Everyone in my employ is quite familiar with time travel. Maxwell is simply better at it than most. But as to the rest of the beings alive today, time travel is still just a device that writers use to comment upon the present day and it's foibles."

"No matter," said Holmes. "Watson and I are content to accept what progress we cannot understand. The situation seems to break down into another period of waiting, Professor. I find inaction to be most tedious. Is there not a way that we can accelerate matters so as to approach the conclusion more quickly?"

"I'm afraid not, Holmes. You see, without going into the mathematics of time travel and manipulation, I can explain it only thus; We are part of this event- Participants, rather than observers. Therefore, we cannot simply visit the moment in time that we solve the case to obtain our answers. No, because we are ourselves part of the puzzle, we have to gain the solution by our own efforts. If we were to go forward in time now, there would not yet be an answer for us to obtain. In effect, we have to find the answer to the question before we could go forward and receive the answer..."

"Boss," said Thornby. "Circular logic will just make you dizzy."

"Indeed," said Holmes. "I quite agree. Although I understood the Professor's explanation, I must admit that the logic is rather torturous. I still find it hard to believe that even though we are dealing with events four hundred years in the past, we are still constrained to watch them unfold as if they have yet to occur."

"I cannot re-write the laws of physics, Holmes," replied the Professor. "I can appear to evade some of them, due to my own technologies, but I assure you that I am not working magic. Rather I am working within the bounds of more accurate physics than that you are familiar with."

"Trust me," said Thornby. "As much as you wish to get back in the field, Holmes, you can achieve more from this position the timeline than you could back in London of nineteen twenty six. Here we can implement an entire plan, watch it to its conclusion, observe our mistakes, and implement a new plan... Without wasting subjective time doing it."

"Subjective time," I began. "What do you mean by that?"

"Subjective- an adjective; 'Deriving from an individual viewpoint or bias.' In other words, the time that each of us perceives to pass," replied Maxwell. "For instance, while you gentlemen have lived through roughly six hours since arriving on this world, I have lived over six years in pursuit of Jones and his master. In those same hours that you saw pass here, Thornby returned to the Professor's home and lived through two weeks of his own research upon Jones and his robbery. Then he returned here. Those six hours are subjective time for yourselves, the two weeks are subjective time for Thornby, and the six years are subjective time for myself. All are equally real, no matter how ridiculous that they sound as having been equal to one another. In this case, objective time can be said to be equal to that which any of us have lived through. That is because there is no true objective time, simply that by which we choose to operate at any given time. We pretend that our own lives are the absolute by which all other times are to be measured. The subjective time only becomes important when several differing rates of time passage have to be reconciled."

"A nice